Angelic Conception
by AlexJanna
Summary: One afternoon a miracle happened. A woman will carry a child with the gift of giving life. Will he be able to give life to the one that needs it the most? Eiri/Shu Warnings Inside
1. Angelic Conception

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

(Chapter 1: Immaculate Conception (Prologue))

* * *

Rumiko sat on her small apartment's balcony looking out over Tokyo. She had one hell of a day. First her boyfriend broke up with her then her boss fired her and now she is getting an eviction notice. Could anything else go wrong?

Just then a bright light seemed to explode from the setting sun and envelope everything she saw in a blinding whiteness that caused her to cover her eyes with her forearm. A burning heat washed over her and she began to freak out. 'Holy shit, what the hell is this?' She was about to duck and cover when the heat stopped.

She slowly let her arm fall from guarding her eyes. She slowly opened one eye then the other. She looked out over the city and saw no signs to lead her to believe that what just happened was real. "Well, maybe I'm just getting flashbacks from that acid I took in high school." She stood up from her weathered lawn chair and turned around.

She bumped into a hard muscled chest covered in a thin white toga like fabric. Rumiko slowly raised her head to come face to face with deep brown eyes. "Maybe my entrance was a little much, but you know it's becoming harder and harder to empress these days."

Rumiko let out a scream and promptly feel to the concrete balcony and began to crawl backwards away from the angelic figure blocking the door. "Who-who are you? What do you want?"

The brown haired and brown eyed man laughed a happy pleasant laugh and bent down presenting a frightened Rumiko with a hand to help her up. She eyed it suspiciously and scooted a little farther away. The angelic figure smiled warmly and stood back up. "I guess I should have introduced myself." He gave a short wave in the air. "Hi my name's Gabriel and I'm a closet show off."

Rumiko snorted, 'You think?' but instead of giving this guy lip she just quickly made her way to her feet and crossed her arms over chest. "My names-"

"Rumiko Shindo, twenty-four, barely graduated high school, orphaned, lost her job and her boy friend today while at the same time got an eviction notice in the mail." Gabriel smiled and gave her a self satisfied wink.

Rumiko stared open mouthed at the beautiful man standing on her balcony. "How did you...?"

Gabriel put his fists to his hips and puffed his chest out. "I'm an angel. Ever heard of the Angel Gabriel?" Rumiko raised her eye brow.

"I don't believe you. If you're an angel show me your wings." Gabriel loved two things the most out of all the things he loved… one, his job and two, showing off. So, naturally he was more than happy to spread his wing span out to its fullest extent. Of course he happened to nock over a potted plant, it plummeted four stories down. He gave a sheepish smile to Rumiko, but it soon vanished as he heard it shatter on the cement bellow and a cat screech on fright.

"Wow… I believe you. So, you can uh… put them away now." Gabriel's wings vanished as fast they had appeared. Rumiko looked a little frightened now. "You aren't going to tell me I have, like ten day left to live, are you? Cause I have tons of things I still what to do with my life."

Gabriel gave her a reassuring smile. "No actually I'm here to give you good news!" he jumped up and down happy as can be.

Rumiko blew out a sigh of relief. "Good."

"God has chosen you to bear a child!" Gabriel looked at Rumiko with amazingly bright happy eyes as he bounced around on the porch. Rumiko on the other hand keeled over her eyes rolling to the back of her head.

Gabriel stopped bouncing and looked down at her. He shifted his gaze toward the sky and asked, "Do you think I should have softened the news a bit?"

A deep thundering response of "Baka" echoed over the city. Gabriel sighed in defeat and bent down to pick up the limp Rumiko and carried her into her apartment.

* * *

Rumiko awoke several hours later and placed a hand to her head. "Man, what a freaky dream. I really shouldn't have taken that acid."

Just then Gabriel popped out of her efficiency kitchen and gave her a bright happy smile. "You're awake! Jeez, I thought you were going to sleep all day!"

Rumiko slapped a hand to her forehead and groaned. "It wasn't a dream. Smiley is still here."

Gabriel hopped into the living room and placed a warm cup of tea down on the cinderblock coffee table. "Aw… you gave me nick name." Rumiko scowled at him and took the tea gulping it down.

"Wait a minute. How did you make tea? The stove's been broken for months." Gabriel wiggled his index finger and the cinder block coffee table turned into a modern glass top with stainless steel legs. Rumiko looked down at the table. "Oh."

Gabriel smiled brightly then grew slightly more serious. "Ok. Now that you are awake we can discuss your job."

Rumiko looked at him in defiance. "I never agreed to any job."

Gabriel scowled. "You don't have to. God has chosen you to bestow his gift upon."

Rumiko scowled right back at the intimidating angel. "What if I don't want to have His child? I can't take care of child! I'd end up breaking it or something." Her defiance soon melted into apprehension. She would love to have a child, but could think of a million different reasons not to have one. Namely that she didn't know the first thing about raising a child.

Gabriel seemed to read her mind. He stood up and walked over to the couch taking a seat next to her. "Rumiko, first of all you won't be having His child. You will be having your child. He just wants to bestow this gift upon someone worthy of it."

Rumiko looked up into Gabriel's kind warm eyes. "What makes me worthy?"

Gabriel sighed and placed an arm around her. "Only He knows that." Rumiko leaned into him and took comfort in his warm embrace. "I can only tell you he has special plans for your child."

Rumiko sat up and looked warily at him. "What kind of plans?"

Gabriel smiled and cleared his throat in preparation for a speech that Rumiko could tell he had been practicing. "Your child will have the gift of giving life as well as taking it away." Rumiko gasped 'My child is to be the angel of death?' Gabriel continued. "He will be a beautifully distinctive child and will never abuse his abilities. And no, he is not the Angel of Death." Rumiko glared at him. 'Quit reading my mind.' Gabriel chuckled, "Sorry."

"So, I am to have a child that can give the gift of life?" Gabriel nodded enthusiastically. "Does he have a specific purpose other than that to carry out in the world?" Gabriel shrugged. "He isn't going to save the world at the cost of his own life is he?"

Gabriel laughed. "No; nothing like that. His powers will eventually dwindle down to only healing, but that won't be for a long, long time. God has a job for him to do before that happens. He will live a long and happy life." Rumiko sighed in relief. She wouldn't be able to bring a child into the world only for him to die soon after.

Gabriel sat back down and studied Rumiko like a child would a snail crawling across the side walk. She looked at him annoyed and asked, "What are you looking at?"

The angel just smiled. "I was watching your mind work. You really are very smart Rumiko-chan."

Rumiko smirk, "Yeah well I don't think God would like you flirting with the mother of this miracle child, would he?" Gabriel suddenly looked frightened and began to glance all around like lightening was going to strike any minute. Rumiko threw her head back and laughed in glee. "I was only kidding; jeez get a sense of humor."

Gabriel scowled at her then stood up again. "Are you ready Rumiko-chan?"

Rumiko looked slightly frightened again. "Am I ready for what?"

Gabriel grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet. "Ready to become a mama, of course!" He smiled brightly at her.

Rumiko snatched her hand away from him and began to step backwards. "Oh, hell no! I may not be the most virtuous woman alive, but I sure as hell am not going to sleep with you the first time we meet."

Gabriel looked scandalized and began to wave his hands in the air wildly. "No, no, no, no, we aren't going to do 'that'!"

Rumiko looked skeptical. "Well, then how am I supposed to have this baby then?"

Gabriel smiled warmly at her. "Sweetie, you are having a child that is of you only." Rumiko began to open her mouth to protest then Gabriel held up a hand to silence her. "I am an Angel scent on an errand for God. All I have to do is touch you and pray."

Rumiko still looked skeptical, but slightly relieved. Gabriel ushered her forward and she took slow steps. When she was finally in front of the tall handsome angel she smiled reassuringly at her. "Ready?" She nodded.

He placed his warm gentle hands over her flat belly and Rumiko began to feel a comforting warmth rush through her. She looked up into the angels face to see his brow creased in concentration. She closed her eyes and let the tingly warmth wash over her.

She felt a slight amount of pressure on her lower abdomen causing her to open her eyes. When her eyes focused she saw Gabriel smiling brightly at her. "How do you feel, Mama?"

She glanced down at her belly and gasped. There was an orange glow coming from her abdomen and she felt a small flutter. A tear slid down her face as she watched the glow slowly dim till all she could feel was that constant happy quivering in her tummy.

Rumiko brushed the tear away and looked up at Gabriel who was still smiling warmly. She let out a mixture between a sob and laugh as she responded, "Good… I feel really good."

The angel gave her belly a little rub then turned to the balcony to take his leave. Rumiko followed him till he jumped on the railing and turned around to speak before leaving. "I will be watching over you so if you ever need any help don't hesitate to ask." Rumiko smiled and nodded. "Oh, and don't forget to make an appointment with an OB/GYN in the morning." Rumiko chuckled a little bit.

Gabriel once again turned to leave then glanced over his shoulder. "Oh, and God has one more favor to ask."

Rumiko sighed in exasperation. "Isn't carrying this miracle child enough of a favor?"

Gabriel chuckled gleefully, "You would think, but no. He wants you to name your baby boy, Shuichi." Rumiko cocked her head to the side.

"Shuichi… I like that name." Gabriel gave her one last smile before jumping off the railing and disappearing into thin air.

Rumiko placed her hands on her belly and looked down at them. "Hi Shuichi. I'm going to be your Mama." She felt a flutter like little butterflies dancing. She laughed and smiled. "You are my gift from God, my miracle baby."

* * *

A/N This came to me one night. I hope enjoy it. Tell if you are interested and I will continue it. I have "Big Plans" for this one. The updates will probably take longer than they would normally because I'm still working on Buoyancy vs. Gravity, but I promise I will try to update regularly. Don't forget to tell me what you think!

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	2. Smiles of a Kitten

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

(Chapter 2: Smiles of a Kitten)

* * *

Eighteen years later…

Shuichi Shindou ran through downtown Tokyo clutching his backpack to his chest. A light pawing and heavy purring caused him to falter and nearly trip over a homeless guy. Yelling his apologies behind him, Shuichi unzipped his back pack to reveal a mangy little kitten with more fleas than hair. "Shush Little One, if you don't stop meowing Hiro's going to hear you and make me take you to the Pound!"

Shuichi gently shoved the little kitten back down into his backpack and continued sprinting down the street. When he spotted Hiro leaning patiently against his motorcycle, Shuichi took a flying leap through the air and landed square in Hiro's arms causing the two to nearly topple over the side of the bike.

Hiro sputtered in surprise before dropping Shuichi on his butt and glaring down at his best friend. "Jeez Shu, you almost made me knock over my bike." Hiro laid a protective hand over the gas tank and cooed to the engine.

Shuichi quickly stood up and clutched at his ferociously fighting backpack as if it were about to explode. "Sorry Hiro! Are you ready to go? Don't want to be late for work!" Shuichi quickly jumped past Hiro and mounted his bike without waiting for an answer.

Hiro snatched Shuichi's helmet away from him and eyed the still struggling backpack suspiciously. "Shuichi, what's in the backpack? And why is it meowing?"

Shuichi barely had his mouth open before Hiro had grabbed the back pack and unzipped the pocket. Out poped Little One with a nice kitten lick poised straight for Hiro's nose. "…Ew…" Bull's eye!

"Awe, see Hiro, she likes you." Shuichi gave Hiro an apprehensive smile. Hiro sighed and gave the backpack to Shuichi, mounted the bike and put his helmet on. "Oh, Hiro, thank you I promise I'll take good care of her!"

Hiro started the engine and they zoomed off the work.

* * *

As Shuichi and Little One snuck noiselessly into the Emergency Room to take up his post as front desk receptionist, he thought about all the times his love for life had gotten him into sticky situations like this.

When he was a child he had found that he couldn't stand to see anything die. He would cry and cry when his mother smashed a cockroach in the kitchen or a spider in the bath tub. Finally his mother had enough and told him a little secret.

[flashback]

"Shuichi honey, I need to talk to you." Rumiko pulled Shuichi into her lap. Shuichi smiled up at her and snuggled close.

"Shuichi, have I ever told you the story about how you came to be here?" Shuichi nodded as his smile began to slip, he felt this conversation was going to be 'deep and meaningful' and he didn't like those kinds. They always made him cry. "I told you about the Angel Gabriel that came and told me I was going to have a baby boy?"

Shuichi smiled again. "That's why you call me your miracle baby!" Rumiko chuckled and smiled.

"Yes you have a very good memory!" She leaned down and gave her Shuichi a big 'mama kiss' on the forehead. "Well, Gabriel also told me that my baby was going to be a very special baby."

Shuichi frowned and tears began to form. "Like special bad?" Rumiko shook her head and Shuichi's tears disappeared.

"Gabriel told me that my baby would be able to give the gift of life. He said my baby would be able to give and take life as he saw fit." Shuichi cocked his head to the side and stared at his mama in confusion. Rumiko sighed and tried to think of an easier way to explain this to a child. "You see, Shuichi, the reason why you hate death so much is because you have a love for life. You have the ability to take some thing that is dead and heal it, make it live again."

Shuichi stared at the wall in awe. "You mean I can bring things back to life?"

Rumiko frowned, "To a certain extent. You can bring them back to life as long as they are willing to come back. If they don't want to be brought back then your efforts go unrewarded."

Shuichi frowned and looked determinedly at his mother. "Mama, I will try and save as many lives as possible. I don't want people to die if they don't want to."

[end]

Shuichi sighed things were so cut and dry back then. As he grew older he leaned that things were not so easy.

[flashback]

"No, Mama, I don't want to let him die!" Shuichi cried over the broken body of his favorite stray dog. Pooh Bear, as Shuichi called him, had been run over by a garbage truck and limped his way to Rumiko and Shuichi's apartment.

Rumiko and Shuichi had come running out of the apartment when Shuichi dropped his chop sticks in the middle of eating ramen to announce that he sensed death. When they threw the apartment door open they were met with the sight of Pooh Bear bleeding and whimpering on their welcome mat.

"Shuichi baby, you have to do it. Pooh Bear came to you asking for help." Rumiko draped her self over her thirteen year old son's back cradling him from behind as tears flowed down her cheeks.

"Mama, I can't! Pooh Bear has to live! He has such a good soul." Pooh Bear lifted his head to look into Shuichi's tear filled eyes.

Shuichi stared back at his friend while his mother rocked and comforted him. "Shuichi, Pooh Bear knows it's his time. It's time for him move on to the next world."

Shuichi broke down into tears, but kept his hands steady as he petted Pooh Bears wet and matted coat. He began to sing to the dying dog to ease its pain as he gently took his life.

_All around me are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces,_

_Bright and early for the daily races, going nowhere, going nowhere _

_The tears are filling up their glasses, no expression, no expression_

_Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow, no tomorrow, no tomorrow _

_I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. _

_I find it hard to tell you and I find it hard to take that people run in circles_

_It's a very, very mad world._

_Children waiting for the day they feel good, happy birthday, happy birthday_

_And to feel the way that every child should, sit and listen, sit and listen_

_Went to school and I was very nervous, no one knew me, no one knew me_

_Hello Teacher tell me what's my lesson, look right through me, look right through me_

_And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had._

_I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take, when people run in circles it's a very, very _

_Mad World._

Shuichi stopped singing and looked into the now dead eyes of his beloved friend. He collapsed over Pooh Bear's empty shell and cried until his mother had to carry is exhausted body back inside.

[end]

That was the first experience Shuichi had with taking a living, breathing being's life. He was only thirteen and did not know quite what death was till he had helped an old friend face it with dignity. Since Pooh Bear, Shuichi cried, but faced it when he was called upon to take a living being's life and help it to the after life. Shu never got used to the feeling of the soul leaving its womb. He didn't like it, but it was part of being what he was… whatever he was.

"Ow!" Little One chose that moment in Shuichi's reminiscing to take a nice big bite out his rib cage where she resided under his shirt to aid in sneaking her into an animal prohibited zone.

She clawed her way out of his arms and scampered down the recovery ward. Shuichi rubbed his ribs as he struggled to his feet to chase after her.

"Little One, get back here!" Shuichi lunged for her and she elegantly dodged out of the way causing him to land face first on the hard tile floor. He raised his head and could have sworn she had stuck her tongue out at him in a mocking gesture. "Oh, you're going to get it!"

She gave a frightened mew then darted down the hallway. Shu gave chase and slide into an open supply closet as he tried to follow her when she made a sharp right turn into a room. He quickly untangled himself from an overly friendly mop and lunged into the room. He saw her slide under a bed as he grabbed for her.

She just escaped him and he sighed in defeat. "Are you looking for her?" A deep enchanting, baritone voice drifted down from the bed Shuichi was currently fishing for the kitten under.

He slowly raised his head to meet with a pair of deep golden eyes. He quickly bounced to his feet and was met with an almost heart warming sight if he didn't feel so betrayed. Little One was curled up on the golden eyed man's lap purring contentedly. "You do know animals aren't allowed in this hospital?" Shuichi's gaze traveled to the owner of that enchanting voice.

He had thick blond hair and a slim form, dark shadows under his eyes and pale skin. He looked tired, but healthy nonetheless. His eyes were deep gold and held a guarded, sad look to them that made Shuichi want to hug him. The longer Shu looked at this man the more he could sense a kind of-

"Baka?" The gorgeous man waved a hand in front of Shuichi face causing him to jump in surprise and fall backward over the visitor's chair next to the bed.

Shuichi struggled to his feet, his face burning a bright read. "I'm sorry to have disturbed you…Uh..."

"Uesugi-san."

"I'm sorry Uesugi-san. I'll take Little One with me and you can get some rest." He began to walk toward the bed, but stopped when he saw a ghost of smile float across the sad man's face.

"Little One? Is that your name?" The kitten purred and began to lick his hand that was gently tugging on her tail. He looked up at Shuichi and smirked at the bewildered look across the younger man's face. "I'll tell you what…"

Shuichi looked back into Uesugi-san's deep, sad eyes, "Shuichi."

"I'll tell you what, Shuichi, if you let me hold on to Little One till this afternoon when they discharge me from this hell hole, I won't tell anyone it was you who brought her here. Deal?" Shuichi was drawn to this man somehow, he couldn't explain it. He felt the need to stare into his eyes until they revealed their secrets.

Uesugi-san was very used to people openly staring at him for his looks, but this was ridiculous. "Hey, Baka. Do we have a deal?"

Shuichi jumped for the millionth time that day and blushed profusely. "I'm sorry Uesugi-san I-"

"Call me Eiri."

Shuichi's mind went blank and whatever it was he was about to say was completely forgotten. Shuichi gave a soft smile. "Yes, Eiri, we have a deal."

Eiri gave a sad smile and began to pet the devil kitten. "Don't forget to pick her up before I check out a two." Shuichi nodded and turned around to leave.

He had his hand on the door to close it behind him when he turned and watched as Little One began to play with Eiri's fingers. Shuichi smiled then felt enormously sad. He wanted to investigate that lonesome, almost died aura around the gorgeous, sad man sitting the bed. Then his pager went off.

* * *

As the day progressed he couldn't stop thinking about Eiri in room 5683 recovery ward. He even went as far as to use his lunch break to look up his patient records. Of course he knew that if any one caught him doing this he would be fired faster than he could blink.

He found out that Eiri Uesugi was a long time patient of Mizuki-sensei, resident psychiatrist. Shuichi found out he had chronic stress and anxiety disorders due to a past event. It didn't say what event, but it was clear that it was something horrible and Shuichi wasn't quite sure if he wanted to find out what. Some things should just stay private. Shu discovered that late last night Uesugi-san was rushed to the emergency room by his brother-in-law for vomiting blood. Shuichi wasn't a doctor, but he knew that was serious.

"Hey, Shuichi, what are you looking at?" Hiro walked up behind Shuichi just in time to read a name and the words "Confidential Records" before Shuichi quickly exited and turned around with an innocent smile like nothing had happened. "Shuichi?" Hiro gave Shuichi a warning look. "Shu, you know you could be fired for looking at that stuff."

Shuichi sighed in defeat. "I know Hiro, but this guy… there's just something about him. I just can't put my finger on it." Shuichi poked the air with his index finger to illustrate his point.

Hiro laughed then looked around in confusion. "Where's that flea bitten cat you picked up this morning?"

Shuichi swatted Hiro's arm and pouted. "Don't call her flea bitten! You probably have more fleas than she does." Shuichi chuckled as Hiro rolled his eyes. "Besides she's with Uesugi-san… Hiro, what time is it?"

Hiro glanced down at his watch. "Two thirty. Why?"

Shuichi gasped and rushed out of the room before Hiro could even take a breath.

Shuichi raced out of the ER and sprinted down the recovery ward till he made it to room 5683. When he opened the door the lights were turned off and the room was completely silent. Shuichi silently turned the light on and looked at the bed.

Little One was curled up in a tight ball purring happily in her sleep. She had a piece of twine tied loosely around her neck with a note attached to it. He carefully untied the twine and unfolded the note to read the perfect hand writing:

Shuichi-

I figured you were busy and couldn't make it to pick up Little One. Seeing as it's against hospital regulation to have animals on the premises I also surmised that you couldn't have sent anyone to pick her up for you. Since she was fast asleep, I didn't want to wake her and I thought you would come lunging into the room soon after I left, so I didn't see the harm and letting her rest with a little note tied to her neck. That is, unless she woke up, chewed through the twine and escaped, in which case I would apologize for letting her get away therefore making you go and hunt her down once again.

Either way, it was nice to have met you and I hope we don't meet again, given as our first meeting was in a hospital and I don't plan on being in the ER for a while. I hope Little One won't terrorize you anymore. We had a little chat and she promised to lie off with the biting for the time being. I hope you don't lose your job for her, though it would be valiant nonetheless.

Good bye, Eiri Uesugi

Shuichi finished reading the note and had a combination of laughter and tears roll through him. He found the letter immensely funny yet the thought of never seeing that sad, mysterious man again made his heart ache.

"He can be very sweet when he wants to be." Shuichi jumped and turned around to see a tall, dark eyed and haired man leaning on the wall just inside the door wearing what looked like a toga.

Shuichi screamed and pointed a shaking hand at the strange, scantily clad man. "Who-Who are you?"

The handsome man gave a soft cheerful laugh. "Your mother said almost the exact same thing."

Shuichi put his arm down and schooled his expression to a curious apprehension. "You're Gabriel, aren't you?"

Gabriel smiled and bounced up and down. "Rumiko-chan told you about me? Aw, I'm so honored."

Shuichi chuckled. "Mom, was right, you are bouncy." Gabriel frowned, but took a step closer.

"Shuichi, I'm here to tell you about your job. God has chosen you to give someone life."

Shuichi's eyebrow rose. "But I do that all the time. He gave me my powers so I could give and take life as needed, correct?"

Gabriel smiled. "Yes, you are very smart for one that nearly flunked out of high school." That earned him a withering scowl. He cleared his throat. "Ahem, well, that's not what I'm here about."

Shuichi sighed. "Well, what are you here about?"

Gabriel puffed up his chest. "You're job is to give a life. This person isn't going to die, per say, but he is already dead. Did that make any since?" Shuichi shook his head. "His body is alive, but his spirit is dead. It died many years ago when he was barely a man."

Forlorn, golden eyes sprung to the fore front of Shuichi's mind. "Eiri Uesugi."

Gabriel nodded his head in a somber gesture. "Yes, I can not tell you what happened; all I can tell you is that it destroyed him. Before, he was happy and had a bright future, but after he became a shell housing a makeshift collage of his former self. He will never be like he was before, but if you can save him he will once again be alive. Eiri will no longer see the world as black, white, and grey. He will see beauty were all he sees is despair."

Shuichi could feel tears flowing down his face, but he didn't bother to wipe them away. Just listening to Gabriel made Shuichi's heart break for Eiri. Now he knows what that aura around him was. It wasn't alive and it wasn't dead it was just there. Shuichi let out a sob and Little One crawled over to lick the hand hanging by his side.

Shuichi lifted up the hand and patted her on the head. He turned to Gabriel and asked, "How am I supposed give him life? I can only restore the physical body to house the soul. I can't restore the soul."

Gabriel gave him a vivid smile that brightened up the heavy and depressing atmosphere. "When I helped your mother conceive you, I prayed for her child to be able to give life. I never specified what kind. It's one of those little loop holes that God purposely ignores."

Shuichi still looked apprehensive so Gabriel swooped down and gave him a tight hug. "It's ok Shuichi-kun. You have the power to do it. I should know; I helped give it to you. God gave you this job because you are strong enough to do it." He pulled back and ruffled Shuichi's bright pink hair.

"If you need any help or have any questions just ask and I will help you." Shuichi nodded. "Don't forget to visit your mother, she's been whining about how you never have dinner with her anymore." Shuichi scowled and Gabriel's smiled even wider. He gave a short wave then vanished into thin air.

Shuichi flopped down onto the neat hospital bed. Little One climbed into his lap and curled up ready for another nap. Shuichi began to pet her and sighed. 'How am I supposed to give Eiri's soul life?'

* * *

A/N I hoped you liked chapter two! I had to rewrite it twice! I hope I didn't confuse any one. The song Shuichi sang to Pooh Bear was Mad World by Tears for Fears. I love that song, the version by Gary Jules makes me want to cry. I was very reluctant to actually put a song into this fic because I wasn't sure if it would ruin it or not so tell me if it sucked and I will revise or just not put another one in. Once again this fic is up on a trial basis so if I don't get good reviews I will most likely not post any more up. If you like it, review; if you don't, well, just don't review. Bye Ya'll Love ya'll long time!

7


	3. Coming Back

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

(Chapter 3: Coming Back)

* * *

Eiri Uesugi curled into his thick comforter shying away from the dim beams of light drifting in from his tightly closed blinds. Being some what of an introvert it had always made him excessively uncomfortable to be forcibly put in the company of other people. He tried hard not be in places where he could be roped into conversations, such as: malls, parks, the street, and hospitals.

His latest trip to the hospital had been slightly more tolerable than the others. At least he hadn't been put there on purpose. His ulcer had been acting up recently due to his deepening depression, chain smoking and heavy drinking. It had literally exploded when he ignored the warning signs. He couldn't say he thanked his brother-in-law for rushing him to the hospital, but he wasn't upset with him either. It just felt like a waste of energy and worry.

He felt constant numbness and often times didn't even realize he was connected to this earth. Though he knew his family loved him dearly he constantly struggled with the urge to leave this world and the need to stay for his family. When he saw the look of utter fear and worry on his sister and brother's faces coupled with the inevitable guilt splayed over his brother-in-laws business mask he knew he could longer torture them with his pain.

With his family in mind he chose to leave this world and spare them the pain of seeing him regress to a joyless, lifeless zombie. It wasn't that he wanted to die it was more like he didn't care if he woke up. And to his great relief he hardily believed one would wake up from a few sleeping pills and a third of a liter of scotch. Knowing his siblings would feel pain and grief at his passing, he took some comfort in the knowledge that in the long run he was sparing them more heart ache.

Eiri could feel his ulcer screaming in protest as the double threat of pill and alcohol attacked the sensitive and still healing, disease like mass of bleeding tissue. The darkness of the late afternoon sun was beginning to fade into complete darkness while he let this mind wonder. Behind his tired lids he saw the faces of his family, the attendants of the hospital, his editor, and every one who meant even the littlest bit to him.

A tear slipped past his heavy lids and he let the inevitable sleep take him away. He silently bid thanks to the gods for his family and to pray for their happiness in life. He could feel his heart slow down and his breathing become increasingly spaced out. His brain processing began to grind to halt and he let his soul curl deeper into his shell as the darkness surrounded him.

On the other side of the apartment Tatsuha unlocked the door with is spare key and noisily stepped over the thresh hold. The absence of typing keys and grunts of a working muse startled him and slowly walked deeper in the apartment. "Aniki?"

* * *

"Mooooooom!" Shuichi pouted as his mother fussed and fawned over him. "You don't have to act like I died and came back or something. Jeez!"

Rumiko smiled and kissed her grown up son on the forehead leaving a red imprint of lips on his skin. She laughed as he scraped at her mark with a napkin. "Shuichi honey, could you help Charlie with the dishes."

Charlie was a tall American with deeply tanned skin and gruff used looking body. Shuichi had stumbled upon him one day while walking home from school and could practically feel the despair radiating off of the grungy looking beggar.

Within the hour Shuichi had dragged him home, given him a change of cloths and let him use the shower. Rumiko allowed him, with much begging from Shuichi, to stay the night and consequently he never left. They had moved apartments several times since and Charlie always seemed to come along not that either Shindou minded. He was fun to have around and helped pay the bills.

When the Shindous asked him if he would ever go back to America and go back home he would simply reply, "I am home." Neither Shuichi nor Rumiko ever argued that statement because as far as they were concerned he had become family.

Shuichi bounced off the couch and rushed into the kitchen to help Charlie. "Hey Charlie, need any help?"

Charlie turned around and smiled at him with a happy twinkle. "Shuichi, finally decided to pay your mother a visit?"

Shuichi groaned and slumped over to the pantry to grab plates and silver ware. "Yeah, I had a weird visit at work the other day and I needed to talk to mom about it. An old… friend of hers came and found me." Shuichi watched as Charlie stiffened and his shoulders began to slump lower than they already were. Shuichi smiled warmly and patted him on the back. "Not that kind friend Charlie; just an old acquaintance." Shuichi could tell that Charlie still didn't like hearing that, but there was nothing he could do about it.

It was very obvious who Charlie laid most of his affections on and Shuichi thought it was sweet and futile. But you never know.

"Who's friend?" Rumiko had just turned the corner into the kitchen where Shuichi was reaching for the plates and Charlie was fixing dinner.

Shuichi turned around and studied his mother's expression while he muttered, "Gabriel." Rumiko's face paled and she lunged into the kitchen grabbing her son and dragging him out to the balcony for a little "chat" leaving Charlie utterly bewildered.

Rumiko slammed the sliding glass door closed and turned her pale face onto her son. "What did he say to you?" she looked more petrified than angry.

"I told him he would be saving someone's life or more specifically someone's soul."

Rumiko whirled around and brandished her feared mother's finger at the tall angelic man behind her. "Now you listen here Gabriel! Shuichi is barely an adult! You couldn't possibly give him an assignment yet!"

Shuichi jumped in the line of fire and turned a red face on his mother. "Mama! I am Eighteen years old and I will be nineteen soon! I can handle it." Rumiko turned to Shu, her face growing bright red before she burst into tears and sank down to the concrete of the balcony. "Mama?"

Gabriel swooped down and placed the hysterical Rumiko on a lawn chair. "She's just frightened. She thinks that if you get and complete this job that god gave you, you will have to die and sacrifice yourself."

Shuichi immediately paled. "Gabriel, will I have to sacrifice myself?"

The angel turned a warm smiling face toward the now frightened eighteen year-old. "No, Shuichi; I don't believe you will have to sacrifice yourself. He doesn't like to give those kinds of assignments unless it's absolutely necessary." Shuichi breathed a sigh of relief. He would gladly sacrifice himself for another, but he didn't know how Charlie, Hiro, and his Mum would deal with it.

Standing up Gabriel patted Rumiko on the head and flashed her a million wing smile. "Rumiko-chan, your little baby is all grown up; and so handsome too!" Rumiko groaned and swatted his hand away.

Giggling, Shuichi watched as the old acquaintances began to argue about whether he is ready for the job. Rumiko screaming at the top of her lungs, Gabriel growing steadily more and more annoyed as she began to poke at him in the chest. The first to notice the sliding glass door had opened with a confused Charlie standing in the entrance way was Shuichi.

He stopped giggling and looked from the still bickering angel and his mother to the stunned and confused Charlie. Charlie cleared his throat and put on his best intimidating glare.

Gabriel slowly turned in the direction of this interruption. His face bust into a bright smile and he raised a hand into the air and bent slightly at the waist. "Good afternoon Charlie-kun!"

Grumbling in annoyance Charlie fixed the angel with a mean stare. "Do I know you?"

Laughing gleefully Gabriel bounced toward the cross man and gave him a big bear hug. "I'm so glad to finally meet you! Rumiko prays for you all the time! You must be very important to have her worry about as much as does Shuichi." Charlie turned a bright shade of red and lifted a hand for scratch the back of his neck in bashfulness. Charlie giggled once again and through a glance at a pale and slightly angry Rumiko. "Lets eat!"

The strange mismatched group sat down at the mismatched table to have a very tasty supper. Banter flowed easily between the person present and laughter seemed to permeate the walls. Chopsticks tinkled on the plates scooping up the last morsels of food when a pair of stainless chopsticks clattered to the table halting all speech in surprise.

Three pairs of eyes turned to stare as Shuichi sat at the head of the table with his hand over his mouth and tears streaming down his face. Rumiko laid a warm hand on his arm. "Shuichi, what's wrong?"

Shuichi struggled to get to his feet and ran to the hall closet to get his jacket. "Death, its strong I have to- I have to go. I need to stop it! He's not supposed to die!"

* * *

Shuichi burst through the door of the ER and flat out ran down the hall where nurses and doctors were scurrying in and out. He could feel it. He could feel Eiri's life slipping away.

Pulse racing and lungs pumping painfully his eyes raced crazily through the ER. His breath hitched when his gaze fell on a tall dark man pleading with nurses and doctors walking past him. Panic and fear wafted off of him as he was reduced to tears in the hall way.

The thing that separated him from every one else in the ER was that Shuichi noticed he looked exactly like a negative image of Eiri Uesugi. Shuichi began to walk toward the hysterical man. When he was with a few feet the dark man turned his fearful on him and clutched at his shirt.

"Please! You have to have to help him. I didn't know what to do. He wouldn't wake up! Please help Eiri!" Tatsuha fell to his knees still clutching at Shuichi's shirt.

Shuichi felt his heart begin to crack. He could feel it; the Eiri's soul was fighting. "Where is Eiri?"

Tatsuha gathered his voice enough to point at a room with doctors and EMS streaming in and out. He couldn't wait any longer. The darkness began to close in around his vision. The smell of death was growing stronger.

He pushed his way through the doors to the room where the blond was laid out on the table. His shirt had been ripped open and an oxygen mask had been placed over his pale and expressionless face. Shuichi watched as a doctor slammed a pair of electrically charged paddles to both sides of his chest. He heard the man shout "Clear!" before a loud cracking buzz shot through the room causing Eiri's back to arch off the table and the skin underneath the paddles to turn bright red.

The heart monitor remained flat and a loud tone continued to echo through the room. Shuichi felt it then. He felt Eiri's soul lingering, wanting to return; struggling against the pull of death. That was all he needed, he knew it wasn't too late.

"Stop!" Rushing forward Shuichi pushed a nurse away from Eiri and placed two warm palms on either side of his cold, damp face. Shuichi bent down placed his forehead to Eiri's and began to whisper, to pray, to feel the energy and light pulse through his body to Eiri's.

"What are you doing? Get him out of here!" The angry voice was completely deafened by Shuichi's thoughts and prayers in his head. A pair of rough, strong hands tried to grab at him and drag him away from Eiri, but a shock of electricity stunned the hands away the moment they touch him. He stayed clutching to Eiri's face with his forehead pressed to Eiri's praying that his soul would return and his body would welcome it back.

Then it happened. Eiri's eyes shot open and his back arched off the gurney. It was the most excruciating pain, having his lungs filled pure air and his heart slamming into his ribs wanting to burst out of his body. Gasping for air the first thing his eyes focused on was a pair deep violet orbs staring intently back at him.

The nurses and doctors were too bewildered by the display to even notice the glowing orange-red light coming from Eiri's once again beating heart. It was literally a medical miracle.

Eiri's breathing steadied and his heart slowed. The sounds of the ER began to penetrate his mind making his ear drums howl in protest. Though his chest and lungs were in excruciating pain he never took his eyes off of the beautiful purple eyes still trained on his. They begin to slowly pull away and a comforting warmth spread through his body as his blood began to pump once again. Eiri began to feel the darkness drift upon him, but this time to only rest his aching body.

Shuichi watched as the hazy, pained golden eyes slowly drifted shut and listened to the sound of his heart beating through his chest and heart monitor's rhythmic tones. He watched as the glowing in Eiri's chest subsided and all that was left was the red and tender skin of Eiri's chest. Shuichi let his knees give way and eyes flutter shut, letting the much needed warmth of sleep take him.

* * *

Eiri awoke to the sound of his over bearing sister and his slacking little brother arguing in heated loud voices.

"Damn it Mika! Do you realize that if you had gone over there this morning when you were supposed to instead of shagging your husband that he would have never been able to take the damn pills!?" Tatsuha was irate. Not only was he being blamed for the Eiri's heart stopping, but his sister refused to take any responsibility for it.

"Tatsuha don't put the blame on me for this! If you had gotten over there faster like I told you, you could have stopped him!" Mika was standing at her full five foot six inches and pointing her finger of death at her littlest brother.

A calm soothing voice lowered the temperature in the hall to a cooling seventy five degrees. "Now, Mika, Tatsuha, this is nobodies fault. If anything the one we should be blaming is in that bed watching the two of you bicker." All heads turned on Eiri who had indeed been watching.

Mika bounded up to here brother, lifted her right hand, and brought it down hard on his left cheek causing his head to be flung to the side and skin to immediately burn bright red. "How dare you! Do you have any idea how worried we were? Your heart stopped Eiri! Your heart!"

Tatsuha walk shakily up to the other side of the bed where his brother's were staring into space not seeing anything. He placed a hand on his shoulder and spoke in a softer more kind voice. "Aniki, you weren't breathing. The ambulance rushed you here and by the time they got you in the ER your heart had stopped. They worked on you for fifteen minutes."

Mika's angry face was covered in splotches of red and tears were now streaming down her face. They had almost him. She had almost lost her little brother. Tohma stepped closer to his wife and wrapped an arm around her. "Eiri-san, you died. They had to shock your heart five times before it started to beat again."

Eiri could hear the concern and sadness in his families voices, he loved them, and it tore him up inside. Then an image of bright purple eyes flashed into his mind. "Who was in the ER with me?"

Tatsuha sat on the side of Eiri's bed and sighed. "I found you and road in the ambulance with you."

Eiri shook his head then turned to Tohma. "The doctors and nurses; who was in the room when I was brought back?"

Tohma looked from Tatsuha to a crying and sobbing Mika in his arms then smiled down at Eiri. "Eiri-san, I don't understan; what you are asking."

The pale blonde rose up to a sitting position and fisted his hands in his hair. "Why didn't he let me die?! Why didn't he let me die?"

Tohma began to reach out and touch Eiri's arms, but his wife stood up and tugged on his arm. Tatsuha was quietly opening to the door and the Mika was following him. Soon the room was empty except for Eiri laying in this bed starring out the window into the late night sky.

* * *

Shuichi had woken up to his best friend frowning down at him. "Hey Hiro." Shuichi's voice was weak and hoarse from the exhaustion and his body was stiff and painful.

"What the hell did you think you were doing?" Hiro had a deep scowl and his fists were resting angrily on his hips. "You could have died trying to bring someone back you barely even know!" Ever since Hiro and Shuichi were little, Hiro had always known Shuichi was different. He figured it out when Hiro caught Shuichi healing the Nakano family dog in the third grade after it got run over by a car. They had been friends ever since and Hiro had always known about Shuichi's gift.

Shuichi gave his best buddy a sheepish grin. "I just had to. His soul was screaming. I couldn't let Eiri move on. His soul wouldn't have been at rest."

Hiro sighed and rubbed his eyes with his fore finger and thumb. "I know, I know, you and your gift are going to get yourself killed one of these days."

A burst of laughter exploded from Shuichi and he launched his self into the surprised arms of his friend. "Oh Hiro! If you could have only felt it! When his soul finally reentered his body it was like a sigh of relief."

Hiro conceded to his friends over abundance of energy and patted his head affectionately. "Shuichi, do you know why he was like that to begin with?"

Shuichi's bouncing stilled and he slowly withdrew form his friend. "No, Hiro, I don't. I don't want to know unless he tells me." The pink haired boy sat back on his heels and looked down at his hands, every muscle in his body was protesting to any and all movement.

"I'm supposed to heal his soul. I'm supposed to help him live." Hiro sighed and patted his best friend on the head.

"You know this will not be easy. But I'll be there to help you." Shu looked up and smiled at Hiro's retreating back. The thing he loved about Hiro was that he never asked questions, just took his word for it.

* * *

Eiri had been lying awake for an hour. He, of course, was playing dead so his siblings wouldn't come in and pester him. It's true the guilt was eating away at him, but what could he do? What was the alternative?

He no longer wanted to live a numb meaningless life. Dying seemed like the best way to do that. He had gotten so close and yet something didn't feel right. It didn't feel like it should when you knew you would be at peace. That puzzled and annoyed him to no end.

A soft knock came from the other side of the door and Eiri lifted his upper body off the bed. "If you've come back to bug then get lost."

The sound of the door creaking open caused Eiri to turn his death glare upon the intruder. He was met with huge violet eyes, bright pink hair, and a deep blush spread across a young male face. He could barely breathe. "You…"

Shuichi slowly walked into the room and stood at the foot of Eiri's bed. "How are you feeling?"

Eiri just stared. Shuichi began to fiddle with the hem of the scrubs he had changed into. "I know you won't remember me, but I'm Shuichi Shindou; we met the few days ago."

The gorgeous blonde man continued to stare. "I'm not going to apologize for what I did. You don't deserve to die, it's not you time."

Suddenly Eiri's brain clicked into action and the events of the night before came flooding back to him.

Horribly immense pain shooting at his dead heart. The feeling of floating in dense air and being completely surrounded by darkness that clouded his thoughts. The distant sounds of voices and machines were barely registering in his ears. Electrical shocks raced through his chest causing him to silently scream in pain. His body convulsing in agony as his body and soul were being forcefully separated.

Then warmth drifted though the dark and cold, pain began to dissipate. A burning heat found his face and filtered through his skin to his heart and lungs. Rushing, rushing though the dark toward a spot of faint light. Faster and faster he flew a magical rope pulling his heart through the dense night. Suddenly the brightest light and earth shattering pain arched through his chest and the rest of his body.

The last thing he remembered was a pair of deep violet eyes begging him to live.

"It was you… you saved my life." Eiri thought it had all been a dream, but now he knew it was real. This shy boy with flamboyant hair and mystifying eyes pulled him away from the clutches of death.

Shuichi was blushing profusely and raised his head to meet the intense and somewhat frightening gaze of the gorgeous, sad blonde. "You remembered."

* * *

7


	4. Osmotic Feelings

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

Chapter 4: Osmotic Feelings

* * *

Shuichi ran. He ran and ran. He ran out of the hospital room. He ran down the hall past Hiro screaming after him. He ran down the stairs and through the lobby past the new receptionist, Suguru, arguing with a senile old woman. He burst through the automatic doors into the chilling night air. He ran through the parking lot and ran through the busy streets of Tokyo. His heart bled as he ran and he pushed faster. He ran over a man hole and through a market. He ran over a rickety wooden bridge and a pebble walk to collapse under a blooming Sakura tree.

His legs burned and muscles cramped. It felt as though blood had filled his lungs and he coughed to pull oxygen into his starving body. His light blue scrubs were soaked with a salty mixture of sweat and tears that continued to pour down his pale cheeks.

Breath coming easier allowing sobs to escape along with coughs he dragged his fatigued body to curl up among the roots of the graceful cherry tree. He clutched at his chest as pain raced through it with every shaking sob. As he curled into the cool bark flashbacks of his visit to Eiri assaulted his mind with a vengeance.

[Flash back]

"You remembered."

Images of his body pale and lifeless, with his shirt torn open to reveal the paddle assaulted skin of his chest clashed before his eyes. The frantic yells and shouts of nurses and doctors around him mixed with the lifeless tone of the heart monitor.

Yes, he remembered. He remembered the pain of violet eyes.

It was then that he fully looked at the boy in front of him. On closer inspection the boy was not a boy at all. Just barely into manhood Eiri observed that Shuichi had a slight, lithe frame with long delicate arms covered in strong capable muscles. His bright pink hair was tussled and sticking out at all angles lending a messy childishness to his other wise adult appearance.

Then Eiri's eyes landed on his face. Soft, tanned skin softened his messy ensemble and his full rose lips matched his blush as it spread across his cheeks.

His eyes... Eiri's throat began to close up and his heart gave a painful pound against his ribs. Shuichi's eyes were pure violet pools of caring innocents. Eiri could feel them bore into his own dead, golden ones with out mercy. He felt like an unworthy dirty intruder. He didn't deserve to look upon this creature's purity.

Movement of Shuichi's rose colored lips snapped him out of his reverie.

"How are you feeling?" Shuichi gazed upon the beautiful, internally dead man.

Eiri's eyes quickly averted from the pools of purity and he stared down at his own hands laying palm up in his lap. He felt dirty. His palms felt as if they were incrusted with grime filling in the creases of his pale skin. He hated them.

"How do you think I feel?"

All at once Shuichi was hit with a solid wall of emotion. He felt hatred inside of him so strong he could barely breathe. His whole body felt dirty and used. It felt as though death was assaulting his heart and soul with no progress. Shu's whole body was shaking and sweating with the strain of staying up right and not crumbling into itself.

Eiri raised his head and met Shuichi's frightened and pained gaze.

Shu's vision was filled with the image of a young, pale teen half naked and bleeding on a dirty, dank carpet. Shu's own body felt as if it had been ripped open and his very core had been sliced away to reveal raw and blistered flesh beneath.

His heart shattered as a thin trembling hand raised a loaded gun and pulled the trigger. Betrayal shot from the barrel as blood, thick as despair, oozed and soaked into the grungy carpet. Clutching his chest he felt his heart leak blood over his lungs as it shattered into his rib cage. It seemed as though hatred and self loathing filled every particle of Shu's being. His face grew pale and his pink locks clung to his fore head damp form sweat.

Just as he could no longer take the onslaught of emotions another wave of malice and miasmic lifelessness washed over him.

A single sentence penetrated his brain's every neuron. "I hate myself." Eiri's voice echoed in his head.

"Stop! Please! No more!" Shuichi collapsed to the cold tile floors, rivers of tears flowing hot and burning down his cheeks.

'I can't breathe. I can't breathe.' His mind screamed louder than a banshee. The air still thick with putrid emotions was pressing down on him, suffocating him. He had to get out.

Struggling to his feet Shuichi took one last look at the magnificent, sad man in the hospital bed. "I'm sorry. So sorry." And he ran.

[End]

Shuichi's body continued the onslaught of tears and pain exiting his tired shaking body.

Bare, tanned feet touched down on the soft crinkly grass. The tall robed angel slowly walked toward the frightened and pained man curled against the Sakura tree as pink blossoms drifted down around him. His sobs echoed in the dark night barely noticing the figure gliding towards him.

Gabriel kneeled down in front of Shuichi and waited till Shuichi raised his tear stained face. The angel gave him a gentle smile and raised his arms, palms up, in invitation.

Without hesitation and one last sniffle Shuichi hurled his self into the waiting arms of his angelic friend. Taken slightly by surprise Gabriel gasped with the force Shuichi put behind his clutching arms and heart wrenching cries. Schooling his surprise Gabriel gently closed his arms around the near hysterical man and allowed his cloud soft robe to be drenched in tears. His left hand rested on Shuichi's back and began to rub soothing circles over his shaking frame while his right hand tenderly petted Shuichi's bright pink hair.

A cool breeze washed over them and Shuichi began to heave in deep shaking breaths to calm his aching lungs. Gabriel let his grip grow tighter around his little friend and his wings began to open. They stretched out, flapped up and down a few times causing fallen cherry blossoms to swirl around them in a calming whirl wind. Gabriel smiled at the beautiful sight and lovingly wrapped his wings around them bringing healing and calming warmth to center on the shaking body wrapped around his torso.

Many moments passed and more cherry blossoms fell before Shuichi slowly began to pull away and straighten. Gabriel unwrapped his wings and gently let Shuichi slip from his embrace to sit in front the angel in a kneeling position to mirror his. Wiping his last few tears away from his cheeks Shu gave a sad laugh and opened his mouth to speak. The angel quickly lifted a hand and placed his index finger on Shu's slightly parted lips to silence him.

"Just close your eyes and listen to the night. Let it fill you and heal you. Look at the moon and the stars." Shuichi smiled and nodded before lifting his head and closing his eyes letting silky petals and star dust brush against his skin. Gabriel let his wings glide to a resting position, inside downy feathers facing the emerald grass, before taking Shuichi's hands in his and joining the young man in silent observation.

Shuichi felt the cool night breeze running through his hair like the fingers of a lover. The moon bathed his tear damp face in warm light to rival the sun and the stars silently sang to him lulling his unintentionally inflicted pain into blissful warmth. He let the soft, prickly grass tickle his ankles and feet. The pink Sakura petals swirled around in the loving breeze mixed with the star dust of the twinkling astral lights.

Taking a last breath to fill his lungs with cool, bright night air Shuichi slowly brought his head down to become level with Gabriel's and opened his once again clear violet eyes.

Gabriel gave him a warm comforting smile and released his hands. "Feel better?" Shuichi nodded and Gabriel continued. "I'm guessing the reason for your distress was the immense pain held within our Uesugi-san." Gabriel sighed. "That man has such turmoil within him it baffles even me!"

Shuichi gave a small laugh at the frustrated shout of his bouncy friend. The small smile was gone and his eyebrows drew together in concentration. "While I was visiting Eiri he had such self loathing in him it was frightening. All of his horribly sad emotions hit me like a ton of bricks I didn't know what happened!"

Gabriel sighed once again. "It seems that because of your connection with Eiri-san you are indeed severely more susceptible to his strong emotions than to others. I am surprised you didn't end up passing out."

Feeling fresh tears begin to well in his eyes at the memories of Eiri's inner pain Shuichi rubbed at his eyes before speaking again. "While I felt Eiri's emotions I saw... I saw... Well, I don't really know what I saw, but it hurt so badly. It was like being ripped open."

"Yes, what you saw were the memories that were flashing through Eiri's mind at the time to cause him to have such strong emotions. What you saw was the event that turned Eiri into what he is now."

His heart sank. Shu could still feel the pain of betrayal radiating through his chest. The angel lifted a graceful finger and poked Shuichi straight in the chest. "Now that you know what Eiri feels almost all the time you can help him even better than before!" Not getting the desired affect of happiness Gabriel sighed for the millionth time. "I know it still hurts, but it won't stop hurting till Eiri stops hurting. You won't feel it as acutely as him, but you will feel it. It will help you give him life."

Panic rose through the young, pink haired man. "What if this happens again next time I try to see Eiri? I won't be able to help him if I'm too over whelmed by his emotions! What will I do?"

Gabriel chuckled at the terrified look on his young friends face. "Calm down! You are not thinking straight. You can block out his emotions can't you?" Shuichi's light bulb flickered on and he nodded uncertainly. "You can block his like you block out other people. Only the strongest of his emotions will slip through your barrier so have no fear my naïve frightened friend. Now that you know what you are up against you are able to battle the enemy. Right?!"

Shuichi felt a new sense of justice flood through him. He has to help Eiri! He will help Eiri. He has the power and will to help the sad, but oh, so, gorgeous man and he will use any means possible to do it!

He jumped to his feet and thrust a fist up into the air. "Eiri, I will give you life!"

* * *

Eiri sat silently in a dark hospital room listening to the infernal beeps of his heart monitor. After the quick and dare he say startling departed of his so called "savior" Eiri had vowed to never speak to that infernal brat again.

It wasn't that he hated the poor kid it was just he seemed to have some wired affect on the punk. One second the kid was shy and innocent and the next his face was contorted in pain and despair riddled his features and mannerisms.

It was almost as if... as if he felt the same things... I did.

Eiri sighed and turned his head away from the window, turning his back on the scorching moon. What does that kid know about pain and despair? 'Nothing!'

Nothing... nothing... nothing...

* * *

5


	5. Scorching Touch

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

Chapter 5: Scorching Touch

* * *

A soft knock sounded from the out side of room 5683. Eiri ignored it knowing full well who it was. 'If I just act like I'm not here maybe she'll go away...' Of course he knew Dr. Kanna Mizuki better than that.

The soft click as the door opened and closed proved his knowledge of her correct. "Well, good morning Uesugi-san I hope I'm not disturbing you."

"You are." Eiri was in no mood to have his brain picked by his nosey psychiatrist. Let alone be actually listened to.

Mizuki-sensei only chuckled. "I'm glad you're back to normal. Now, how have you been doing?" Kanna had to keep her mood light or she would have killed Eiri a long time ago. Despite all of their misunderstandings she genuinely liked Eiri and tried her hardest to help him in the only way she knew how: therapy.

Eiri was having none of her happy go lucky attitude today. "You know damn well what I've been doing and what I'm feeling. Isn't that what I'm paying you for?" Ok, maybe that was a low blow, but he couldn't help it if he needed an attitude adjustment.

He had been brought back to a miserable numbingly painful life from the clutches of a merciful death and if that wasn't bad enough he had one of the worst nightmares since 'it' happened and didn't get a wink of sleep after that. The way he saw it he was definitely entitled to stew in his own angst-y self loathing.

Mizuki sighed and did something Eiri would have never expected in his three years of therapy. She slowly stood up and walked around the side of the bed to look him in the eye. "Obviously my usual tactics aren't getting us anywhere so I'm going to try something different." She pulled back her right arm, balled her hand into a fist and punched him square in the jaw.

Eiri was pushed back against his pillow with the impact of her punch. He was stunned silent. Mizuki quickly pulled her hand back and rubbed her bruised knuckles. "Now that I've got that out of my system maybe we can get some progress." She had been itching to take out her rage on him. How dare he disregard the feelings and wishes of those connected to him to end his "horrible" existence?

Eiri couldn't speak. His jaw was throbbing and he knew it was going to swell into a nasty bruise later. He slowly turned to look at his psychiatrist with a bewildered and completely puzzled look.

The door slowly opened and a portly nurse pocked her head inside with an annoyed glare. "Mizuki-sensei, is everything alright?"

Kanna turned and gave her a bright smile. "Oh, everything is perfectly fine, thank you." The nurse gave her a nod and quickly exited the room. Kanna turned back to her patient and gave him a stern scowl.

"Now that your head is clear and you know I won't take anymore shit from you this morning, would you like to tell me about why you tried to commit suicide?" She was definitely a direct woman. In fact the only woman that never had a fear of succumbing to Eiri's "masculine wilds". As a general rule she took no shit off of him or any of her other patients, which is most of the reason why Eiri hadn't "fired" her long ago.

Eiri gently rubbed his quickly swelling jaw and gave her an evil frown. He knew he couldn't get out of a session, but he would still stall if he could. Feeling it was within his best interest to not push his shrink any further he sighed and gave her what she wanted.

"I... I got tired." Kanna sat down next to his bed, taking out a pad and paper she nodded for him to continue. "I can't take the numb anymore. I just had to... I don't want to live like this anymore."

Kanna set down her pen and looked at her friend. "Eiri, why didn't you just call me or your sister and brother? You could have talked to us, we would have been happy to listen."

Shaking his head, Eiri knew she wouldn't understand no matter how many times she told him she did. "Just forget it ok. It didn't work so what does it matter?"

He looked up at her and noticed her hands were shaking as they clutched her note pad. "Of course it matters! If you die don't you know how many people will be affected by your death?"

Clinching his fist, Eiri lost his thin control. "I don't care! It's better for everyone if I'm gone. All I do is cause those who care about me pain! I want my outside to match my inside: dead! Why did that damn brat have to interfere?" He felt so lost and hurt. The prospect of life with nothing, but lonely emptiness and old, stale pain was enough to cause his ulcer to rupture.

Completely stunned by this outburst Kanna stood and sat on Eiri's bed. It usually took a drunken Eiri to even come close to that kind of honesty during their sessions. "Eiri... Why do you think you are dead inside?"

He could feel his throat closing up and damned if he was going to start to cry in front of the most infuriating woman known to man. Instead he chose to actually answer her question. Maybe a near death experience was making him soft in his still beating yet shriveled up heart. "I don't think I have a soul. I had one... but it died long ago." He looked down at his lap where his putrid and poisonous hands laid motionless and slightly bent. "My soul died with 'him'..."

Kanna sighed and shook her head. 'He' was the bane of poor Eiri's existence. 'He' had been haunting her client these past six years. 'He' was a no good piece of shit, but don't let Eiri hear you say that.

Placing her hands on Eiri's shoulders, Kanna gently applied pressure. "Eiri, he has no hold on you any longer. You have your soul and it's alive, you just need to believe it yourself."

It was like trying to hold a therapy session with a brick wall. One moment it would be complying and helpful then the next it would be harsh and unforgiving. She took her hands away from his shoulders and stood up to gather her things.

Before she opened the hospital door and stepped out of the room she turned back to look at Eiri. He still had his head down, blindly staring at his hands. He would do that sometimes. Kanna only thought it was a way of showing that particular subject was over. He would always look at his hands after discussing 'him'.

Eiri was lost in his mind remembering... remembering what happened. He barely heard Mizuki-sensei tell him to come back to the hospital for their regular appointment time before she silently closed the door behind her.

The caverns of his mind slowly bent and twisted in painful recollections and fuzzy spikes of anguish. His deep baritone voice escaped through his dry mouth bouncing off the walls to reach his eyes in barely a whisper.

"I'm so sorry... It should have been me..."

* * *

Shuichi groaned in pain as he rolled over and promptly fell off the bed and onto the dirty hard wood floor of his apartment. What a night! He hadn't run like that since he was on the high school track team before he got kicked off for failing chemistry; and God knows how he was paying for being so lazy now!

As if on cue and knowing how much pain her owner was in, Little One chose that moment to launch her self off the bed and pounce, with claws out, directly onto the back of Shu's excruciatingly sore thighs.

"YYYEEEYYYOOOWWW!" Shuichi jumped up in pain and swatted at the back of his legs in an unsuccessful effort to dislodge the satanic kitten from the back of his boxers. "Owy, owy, owy, owy!" Little One, feeling merciful, retracted her talons and scampered off to maul the toilet paper roll in the bathroom.

After collapsing back on his bed with another yelp of pain Shuichi glanced toward the alarm clock on his bedside table. "Shit!" The furious red numerals read ten thirty. Work for Shuichi started at eight!

* * *

"I'm late. I'm late. I'm late. I'm really, really, really late!!!!" As he jogged down the busy street Shuichi thrust his hand down into this backpack and dug out his well loved, well abused cell phone and dialed a well memorized number.

"Hiro, you bastard, pick up!"

"Hello?" A voice broke through the seemingly never ending pattern of dull rings.

"Why the hell didn't you wake me up?! I'm late! K-san's going to kill me!" Shuichi took a flying leap over a hobo as he screamed profanities at his reseeding back.

"My blood will be on your hands Hiro! Yours! It will be all, your fault!" Claude K. Winchester was not known for being merciful. Quite the opposite really as he was especially brutal on his "favorite" employees. He was the hospital director and did literally whatever he wanted. Few went against him and those who did either had balls of steel or were oblivious to the obvious danger of losing said balls.

Hiro had to hold in his laughter. He could tell his friend hadn't slept well last night and decided let him sleep in "forgetting" to leave a note and remind his hyperactive friend what day it was. "Shuichi, calm down; it's Saturday. You have today off." The panting and jogging sounds stopped abruptly and only the sounds of common street noise could be heard. "Remember Shuichi, you traded shifts with Suguru?"

Hiro heard an abrupt thump and the sound of panicked voices through the receiver. "Shuichi?... Shuuuiiichi?"

* * *

Hiro's head rose to see his best friend looking tired and a tad beaten up coming through the automatic door of the Emergency Room.

Shuichi stumbled over to the counter and slammed his head down on the cold Formica surface. Sighing in exhaustion he just lay against the desk and waited for his friend to acknowledge his presence.

Seeing his friend look like the living dead, Hiro patted him on the head. "What's up buddy? I thought you would go back to bed."

A small growl escaped the shorter man. "I was already half way here and I had already missed the train back to the apartment. Then I figured since I was going to have to wait for another thirty minutes for the train I thought, 'Hey! I might as well go and bother Hiro till his shift ends!' So, I walked here."

Hiro raised an eyebrow and looked at his friend with a quizzical brow. "Shuichi, why did you really come to work today?"

Shu straightened up and looked around with shifty eyes. "What do you mean, Hiro? Should I have ulterior motives other than entertaining my bestest, best friend in the world?" The red head narrowed his eyes at the skittish young man. Shuichi shifted from one foot to the other in apprehension. "Ok! Fine! You caught me! I was coming to visit Eiri."

"Eiri?" That name sounded familiar, but Hiro just couldn't place it.

"You know the guy I saved..." No matter how many times Shuichi said that or used similar words they still didn't sound right to his ears.

Crossing his arms over his chest the taller man scanned his friend. "You're on a first name basis with that jerk?"

"Don't call him a jerk, Hiro! You don't even know him." Shuichi was quick to bristle, but not so quick to actually think about his statement.

Rolling his eyes, "Might I point out that you know just as much about him as I do. That's the pot calling the kettle black, don't you think?" Hiro was quick with words and always won, much to Shuichi's dismay.

His small, strong shoulders sank and he looked at the ground. "Hiro, if only you knew..."

Suguru chose that moment to unknowingly distract Hiro from his friend's slip up. "Nakano-san, I must ask you a question about filing... er… Am I interrupting something?"

Hiro's head snapped to look at the spot in front of the desk where his friend used to be. It was empty. Sighing deeply, Hiro turned back to the younger receptionist and put on a bright smile to hide his frustration with his best buddy. "No, you're not interrupting anymore. He seems to have disappeared." Suguru made an "oh" face and turned to lead Hiro to his subject of understanding turmoil.

* * *

Shuichi quickly walked down the recovery ward toward Eiri's room and was about to turn the corner down the right hall way when he bumped smack dab into a tall attractive woman.

"Oh, I'm so sorry! Here, let me help you." He bent down quickly and snatched up her scattered papers. When he brought up his head to look her in the face he was met with a very pleasant smile.

She was beautiful and had a kind face. Her brown hair was cropped short, but fit her face and body perfectly. A dark blue skirt suit fit snuggly and complimented her form like dew on a spider web. One of the prettiest smiles Shuichi had ever seen lit her face when their eyes met. Nothing, but intelligence and warmth wafted off of this woman as it permeated Shuichi's barrier.

Her beautifully shaped lips formed an excited smile. "Excuse me for being so forward, but are you Shuichi Shindou?" It had to be him. Pink hair and purple eyes weren't common anywhere.

"Uh... Yeah, I am." Shuichi was taken by surprise. Almost no one in the hospital actually knew his name. "Do I know you?"

A shocked and embarrassed look crossed her calm face. "Pardon my impertinence. I am Dr. Kanna Mizuki. I'm a resident psychiatrist."

Dr. Mizuki?! That was the name of Eiri's shrink. Shuichi's mind was running a million miles an hour. Mizuki seemed to register the shock and recognition on his face. "I'm also Eiri Uesugi's psychiatrist. I don't usually tell people who my patients are, but I think under the circumstances it is warranted."

Shuichi was utterly confused now. It doesn't seem like such a hard thing to understand, but he couldn't even fathom a time when it would be appropriate to discuss one's patient with anyone that wasn't even in medical school. "Excuse me Mizuki-sensei, but why are you telling me that you're Eiri's shrink?"

Kanna gave a pleasant laugh despite the seriousness of the conversation. Shuichi was just as cute as she expected. He had great innocence and intelligence. The latter didn't show as much, but it was there. "You are the one that saved Eiri's life, are you not?"

"How did you know about that?" Shuichi began to panic. If people knew about his secret then all sorts of trouble would come to him. The possibilities were innumerable.

The subject of Eiri's suicide attempt was still like a burning wound to her and she preferred to approach it with the utmost professionalism. Her shrink face was plastered over her pretty features and she began to work like a calculating machine. "When I learned of Eiri's suicide attempt I spoke to the doctors handling him. They mentioned in passing," translation: were very reluctant to talk about, "that a young receptionist burst into the ER and practically threw his self on top of the 'patient'. Soon after said receptionist made contact with Eiri, his eyes opened and he gasped for air as if coming up from under water. Apparently, Eiri's flat line 'magically' beeped in a normal heart beat."

Shuichi was feeling extremely nervous. All he wanted to do was walk away from this scary smart woman. She wasn't like any of the other doctors who would just write it off as a freak miracle. She was calculating Shuichi's involvement and that was very dangerous.

She carefully watched the emotions flip over Shuichi's face. He was becoming quite a hard person to read. So many emotions, so little time. "I don't particularly believe in magic, Shindou-san, but I have seen some pretty unbelievable things in my life." A clever smirk spread across her lips. "I may or may not believe that you are the reason Eiri's heart beats right now. I do believe he needs help. You may be able to give him that."

She gave a small bow to the stunned young man and began to walk down the hall toward the Psych Ward. "Have a nice day, Shindou-san." She looked over her shoulder and smirked even wider when Shuichi's face still held a petrified look of surprise.

* * *

Sitting quietly in his room, Eiri continued to stare at his sullied, lifeless hands. He felt dead. There was no way around it. The only thing missing in his nonexistent life was a grave marked with his name.

'He' had died and Eiri could never forgive him self. He knew it wasn't truly his fault, but it left him feeling cold and disconnected. No matter how many women he bedded and how much money he made he never felt really alive. They didn't matter to him.

The only things that mattered to him were gone or better off without his dead shell of person.

Shuichi quietly knocked on the door and waited patiently for a response. Everything was silent inside; gently he turned the handle and slowly pushed the door open.

Shuichi's bright violet eyes met the sight of Eiri with his back facing the door, staring intently at something in his lap. In almost an inaudible whisper Shuichi spoke. "Eiri-san? May I come in?"

Eiri halted in his study of the dirty tools and slowly turned to face the very familiar voice. It couldn't be him. It couldn't be Shuichi. He didn't want that brat here.

His golden eyes met Shuichi's and just stared in stunned silence. Taking the thick, vibrating quiet as ascent, Shuichi slowly walked into the room, but was careful to keep his distance.

From his position just inside the door way he could feel loathing and putrid emotions being hurled at his carefully constructed wall. He feared that if he moved any closer he would be drowned in Eiri's unconscious projecting and have an unwelcome repeat of last night.

Taking a deep breath and an even deeper gulp Shuichi opened his mouth and spoke in what amazingly sounded like a calm pleasant voice. "I'm glad you are feeling better this afternoon, Eiri-san." The blond only nodded in acceptance to this statement. Shuichi took a tentative step closer. Slowly the bombardment on his wall was becoming less and less.

"I'm sorry about... running out on you yesterday. It was terribly rude of me. I... I wasn't feeling quite well." Not quite a lie, but also not really the truth. Shuichi hated untruths yet, it seems that he always had to tell them.

Eiri scoffed showing the first sign of life since Shuichi had stepped foot into the room. It looked like the kid was physically affected by Eiri and not just under the weather. He had promised his self that he would never see the boy again, but here said young man was, as plain as the nose on his face, trying to apologize... What the hell kind of a person was he?

In an attempt to not completely break his own promise to his self, Eiri reverted back to his ass holey self he knew and... Well, he didn't quite love. "If that is all you are here for then you are wasting your breath." Now; for the kiss off. "So, in that case, get the fuck out of my room." Ok, not quite so kiss off, as fuck off.

Shuichi could practically feel this sad man's emotions changing color in his own body. Along with the morose desire to die he also felt anger, which, coincidentally, gave him the strength and back bone to put this jerk in his check. 'Whoa, where did that come from?'

"I don't much appreciate your attitude Eiri-san. Either you sit there and hold a normal conversation with me or I will personally ensure that you never leave this hospital." Shuichi smirked to his self. He could feel the shock filter through that blond "ass". He had definitely threatened him with the one thing that Eiri didn't want.

His eyes narrowed and his brow furrowed in a definite death glare. Who the fuck did this little punk think he was? No one talks to Eiri Uesugi like that. Well except for Mizuki, but she just barely gets away with it.

Suddenly Shuichi could feel his fragile wall slowly build strength. The impact of Eiri's emotions was dwindling. Shuichi could once again feel his own heart instead of the man sitting on the hospital bed in front of him. Breathing a sigh of relief, Shu squared his shoulders and stood his ground staring Eiri straight in the eyes.

With a heavy sigh, Eiri broke the staring contest and once again looked toward his hands. "Why did you bring me back?" It was quiet, almost a whisper, but it left Shuichi's ears ringing as if an explosion had gone off.

Shuichi could barely begin to form words for that question. He struggled, opening his mouth several times then closing it just as many. Finally he found his voice and spoke to the beautifully sad man before him. "You wanted to be saved. You weren't ready to leave."

"Bullshit." Eiri was having trouble breathing. All Eiri had wanted in the last six years was to die and the man that kept him from that was standing just a few feet away and had the balls to tell him that he wasn't ready, that he wanted to live. "You don't know what I want. You don't even know _me_. Who gave you the right to bring me back?!" Without thinking Eiri stood up from his place on the bed and advanced toward the pink haired man coming within a foot of him. Raising both hands he slammed them into the wall on either side of Shuichi's head pinning him against the stark white wall.

Much to his own surprise Shuichi stood his ground and kept eye contact with the quickly losing control Eiri. Keeping a calm, level voice Shuichi looked up into Eiri's angry golden eyes. "Eiri, if you were truly ready to die then even God himself wouldn't have been able to bring you back." Becoming steadily braver Shuichi raised his right hand and placed his palm over Eiri's chest directly above his frantically beating heart.

Warmth began to penetrate his skin. Slowly Eiri broke eye contact and shifted his gaze to stare at the strong, lean hand pressing over his heart. An orange-yellow light began to glow beneath Shuichi's skin sending radiated waves of comfort throughout Eiri's body.

His breath hitched. He hadn't felt his kind of warmth since… "What…? How are you doing that?" His airy whisper echoed through the heated air and Shuichi simply looked up at him with a warm smile.

His lips parted and words began to form. "Eiri, I-"

"What is going on here?!" A shrill and high pitched voice brought Shuichi out of his thoughts shattering Eiri's warm comfort like glass.

Pulling his hand away as if burned, Shuichi blushed, a deep red stain spreading over his cheeks and quickly ducked under Eiri's left arm. Hurrying to the door he hastily gave a small bow to Nurse Sakura, pushing past her and running through the door.

Eiri straightened up ignoring the icy coldness settling itself deeper into his chest by the second and gave his best fatal glare to the plump nurse. "Was there something you wanted?" He tried to intimidate her, but she just wouldn't have it.

Crossing her arms and popping her head from side to side with attitude she raised one eye brow she showed no sign of being anywhere near frightened or nervous. "Uesugi-san, if you don't get back in that bed by the time I count to three I will call the male nurses in here to come and sedate your ass. So, pick: willful rest or rest by injection, which is it?"

Eiri knew when to fight and knew when to stick his tail between his legs and show throat. Grumbling he walked back to his bed and begrudgingly slid back down with a not so graceful _humph_.

Nurse Sakura straightened her back and uncrossed her arms. "I thought so…" She gave him one more eye brow raise then left the room letting the door shut loudly behind her.

Eiri glared at her reseeding back and grumbled ferociously under his breath. "#%$... bitch… &%$#"

* * *

Shuichi didn't stop running till he had thrown him self into an empty supply closet and had barricade the door with a mop, a bucket, and a box of empty chemical bottles.

He raised his shaking hands to his chest and breathed deeply trying to steady his racing heart. "What the hell was that?"

"That would have been the intensification of yours and Eiri's connection modus operondi of physical body to body contact, or as we angels like to call it: Touching!" Gabriel smiled happily and bounced with the last word effectively smacking his already dangerously unstable head into the burned out light bulb hanging from the ceiling.

"Jesus! What the hell are you doing here?!" If Shuichi's heart hadn't been near cardiac arrest before it sure was now. "You scared the living day lights out of me!" He was just about fed up with this happy-go-lucky angel and Shu was thinking of ways to kill him with nothing, but a paint brush and a feather duster.

Gabriel rubbed his throbbing head and grinned sheepishly at Shuichi. "Sorry… I forgot you couldn't sense my aura." Shuichi growled, but Gabriel ignored him. "The reason I'm here is to explain something to you, but it seems that before I could get to you, you already discovered it."

Shuichi slammed a fist on his hip and used his other lethal index finger to poke a hole in Gabriel's rock hard chest. "Spill it mister before I get violent."

Suppressing the urge to giggle hysterically, the angel squared his shoulders and gave Shuichi a serious look. "I came to inform you of the risks you will take when making body to body contact with Eiri-chan."

"Eiri-chan?"

"Yes, Eiri-chan." Clearing his throat Gabriel continued. "It seems that your connection to Eiri is stronger than the other Arch Angels and I predicted. God left it up to us to monitor and assist your progress without briefing us on the specialty of your case."

His shoulders slumped and he leaned against a shelf full of cleaning supplies. "It seems as though your connection is stronger than the average one we are used to dealing with. We knew ahead of time that due to your unique and specific power any connection made between you and your future ward would be stronger than normal, but we had no idea it would be this strong."

Shuichi narrowed his eyes at the tall angel. "I don't quite understand."

"Normally people with a spiritual connection are able to feel faint traces of emotions from their wards, but you are able to feel the full extent of Eiri's feelings because of your unique power. Normally people with such a connection would only be able to administer comfort based on external observation, but you know what is needed and how to comfort even before Eiri does." Shuichi could almost taste the angel's excitement at this revelation. "You are able to use your powers of Life and Healing as well as your own instincts based on your interceptions of his emotions to give comfort to Eiri." A dreamy look glazed over Gabriel's eyes. "Really remarkable… if only I could get you back to Heaven to-"

"Hold up!" Gabriel halted mid thought and looked at the shaking Shuichi. "Are you telling me that you should have known this would happen?" Gabriel nodded. "You're also telling me that I will be able to comfort him based on my knowledge of his feelings and my own odd Shu-instincts." Gabriel smiled. "Allrighty then. I should have known something like this was going to happen."

Grumbling to him self Shuichi began to de-barricade the door and ready himself for the already somewhat confusing day ahead. Turning to say something to the annoyingly chipper Angel he halted and shook his head.

Damn Arch Angel couldn't even say good bye without disappearing into thin air first. Oh well. He'll get his revenge some other time.

Stepping out of the closet Shuichi began his descent to the lower level Emergency Room all the while rubbing his slightly aching chest.

This comfort thing was good and well except for one thing: Eiri needed more than just comfort. His whole being ached with need for more. Eiri ached for a companion.

* * *

A/N Sorry for the terribly long wait. I know ya'll will probably be uber pisser with me now for making ya'll wait for so long, but it was unavoidable. One cannot control the disappearance of one's Muse. Any hoo I hope you like it. It took me over a month to write which is depressing in and of its self, but I am working on getting the next chapter finished for my other fiction so keep watch. Review, I need constructive criticism and lots of love!

10


	6. Spicy Yellow Flowers

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

Chapter 6: Spicy Yellow Flowers

* * *

Eiri had been home from the Hospital for two weeks now.

He hadn't thought about or tried to commit suicide since returning home, but he has thought about committing a couple of homicides.

Since he had stepped through his front door Mika, Tatsuha, and Tohma had been constantly in and out. He had gotten his locks changed twice as well as his number, but they still managed to figure out a way into his house onto his answering machine.

It's not that he blames them from being worried it's just that this is damned annoying. It seems as though he can't get a moment's peace, his eye keeps twitching, his ulcer is acting up, and his writing is suffering severely.

Though these things are disturbing, perhaps, the most disturbing thing of all is that since he left the hospital his dreams have been filled with violet eyes, a warm orange glow, pink hair, and a kind smile. His nights aren't riddled with gunshots or gushing blood, the pain of splitting apart or the stab of betrayal.

He can't deny who the dream is that has seemingly chased away his nightmares with so little effort. Every since he had laid eyes on Shuichi, something had changed. The icy chasm in his body no longer felt Arctic, though Siberian wasn't much of an improvement it was at least note worthy.

Eiri pulled his favorite mug from the cabinet and filled it with black coffee.

He was two spoonfuls away from the perfect amount of sugar, when the door bell rang.

Pausing in puzzlement, Eiri had to think. If it were one of his siblings they would just waltz in and begin to nitpick like old hens. No, this wasn't a sibling.

Walking cautiously toward his door, he unlocked it and slowly pulled it open.

There standing in his apartment building's hallway with a large bouquet of flowers was Shuichi.

The pink haired receptionist jumped when he noticed the door was open then smiled widely, though he felt like cowering.

The look on Eiri's face was intimidating. It was a mix of disgust and confusion and once again Shuichi's carefully constructed shields began to slip. The waves of despair, conscious and unconscious, were bombarding him.

Paling slightly, Shuichi tried to maintain his smile as he raised the flowers up and thrust them at Eiri. "Good morning, Eiri-san. I'm sorry it has taken me so long, but I couldn't find your address anywhere! I ended up having to sneak a peak at the hospital records, but I swear I didn't see anything other than your address! Anyway, these are for you; they reminded me of you!"

The flowers were golden yellow and smelled spicy. Strangely enough, Eiri didn't feel repulsed by such a gift. It was time to close the door and ignore the oddly beautiful young man standing on his door step. Definitely time.

As if reading his mind Shuichi's hand shot out and clasped tightly to Eiri's wrist. "Um... may I come in?"

With a raised eyebrow, Eiri weighed the pros and cons of such an acquiescence, but before he could even ascent or reject such a request, Shuichi was saying thanks in that chirpy manner of his and pushing passed him into his front foyer.

Damn! That kid is fast, annoying, and impertinent.

"Wow, Eiri-san. Your apartment is beautiful!" It was easily twice the size of Shuichi's and his mother's flats combined.

Shrugging in annoyance Eiri replied, "Gotta' live somewhere," before stalking back into his kitchen to trade his cooling sugared coffee with a beer. He figured he was going to need it.

Shuichi followed him, still clutching the bright and cheery flowers.

Turning around from the fridge with his beer clasped in his hand tightly, Eiri grudgingly offered, "Want something drink? Tea, coffee, milk?"

Milk? "I'll just have coffee, thank you." Now that Shuichi had a little bit of a distraction, his shields were repaired and keeping some distance between himself and Eiri's miasmic emotions. "You know, it's unhealthy to drink this early in the morning."

"That's nice." Eiri really didn't need another mother hen and could tell this kid was just going to get on his nerves in about four seconds if he said anything else about the beer.

Shuichi could feel Eiri's annoyance and decided to pick and choose his battles wisely. He remained silent on the subject.

Eiri, seeing that Shuichi wasn't going to persist, asked dryly over his shoulder, "Cream and sugar?"

Pulling himself away from studying the rather sparse furnishing of the kitchen and dining room, the pink haired young man responded, "Four table spoons of sugar, please."

Pausing in his actions, Eiri turned around and studied his guest. The pink haired boy was looking around his home from his seat at the kitchen table and not paying a bit of attention to him. It seemed a little strange to Eiri that this pink haired brat requested the exact amount of sugar he, himself put into his coffee.

Shrugging that thought off, he took the freshly fixed cup of coffee over to his guest. "Here."

Smiling sweetly, Shuichi placed his hand around the mug letting his fingers lay over Eiri's.

Nearly jumping in surprise, Eiri had to blink a couple of times to make sure he wasn't just imagining it. There, where his skin was touching Shuichi's, an orange glow was radiating from their fingers and sending calming warmth spiking up his arm.

Taking in a shuddering breath, Eiri looked his softly smiling guest in his deep violet eyes and asked, "What are you?"

Shuichi took the mug from Eiri and brought it to his lips before answering. "I'm a Healer." _Of sorts..._

The blond writer couldn't quite comprehend that statement. "What?"

Chuckling kindly, Shu tried to explain. "Eighteen years ago, my mother was visited by an angel who told her she was to conceive a child with the ability to Heal whom ever he saw fit." He hoped he wasn't going to get into trouble for not telling Eiri all of the truth, but as it was, the gorgeous blond man wouldn't believe him. "I was born nine months later."

"I don't believe you." Eiri couldn't decide whether he should kick this kid out of his apartment or drive him to the nearest loony bin.

"But Eiri, you remember." And indeed he did.

He remembered the excruciating pain of life being shot back into his cooling body and the sight of those clear violet eyes that were staring back at him the moment he opened his eyes; the same eyes that are carefully regarding him from across the kitchen table.

"Say, I do believe you are a... Healer. Why are you bothering me? Why don't you go and... Heal people or something?" Eiri had forgotten his beer some time ago and was now studying his pink haired guest with an intensity that almost had Shuichi squirming in his chair.

"It doesn't really work that way, Eiri." Lowering his eyes, the younger man ran his fingers up and down the side of the warm mug.

His golden brow scowling thickly now, Eiri asked, "Well, how does it work?"

This was the part that got slightly sketchy. He couldn't just out right tell Eiri that God Himself had put him to the task of healing his soul. "Um..."

A golden eyebrow rose in prompting.

"I can't just Heal people that don't need or want it."

"Then, why, pray tell, did you save my miserable life?" His eye was twitching and he knew it. To think this could have all been over with if this miracle brat hadn't stuck his nose where it wasn't wanted.

"Oh, but Eiri! You did want to be saved. You did!" Shuichi had leaned forward in the intensity of his conviction. He had to help Eiri understand.

"Do not presume to know anything about me!" He had stood up so fast that chair went sprawling across the floor to topple over. Eiri was shaking, he didn't know whether it was from denial of admitting that Shuichi was right or from his frustration, but he could barely control his anger.

Remaining calm, Shuichi took another sip of his coffee and looked up at his seemingly enraged host. Shu wasn't feeling rage from him though, he was feeling frustration, fear, denial, an ache deep inside that he couldn't quite place, but he knew that Eiri wasn't really as angry as he seemed. He was frightened.

"Eiri," Shuichi began. "I have been assigned to you specifically. I don't expect you accept it now, but I can help heal you."

"I'm fine." Eiri ground out. "I don't even have a bloody paper cut, now get out of my house!"

Before Eiri could blink, Shuichi was out of his chair and directly in front of him. He slowly, gently placed his warm hands on either side of Eiri's face and brought their foreheads together.

The tall blond was stunned. Warmth more intense than what he had felt in the hospital when Shuichi had placed his hand on his chest seemed to permeate his entire being. It flowed form Shuichi's finger tips, his palms, his forehead, his very proximity.

It was soothing in a way Eiri, had never associated with anything. The tenseness of his shoulders and the aching of his ulcer faded away from his memory and he let his eyes drift closed.

Letting out a soft sigh, Eiri raised his hands and placed them on Shuichi's shoulder blades and inched the smaller body closer to his. The warmth intensified and Eiri let his eyes slit open.

Shuichi had a soft smile on his lips. This was far from all of the healing that was needed, but it was a start and it helped to ease some of Eiri's doubts and anxiety. At least now, Eiri's ulcer wouldn't act up so readily.

The warmth began to ease and lessen in intensity and Eiri felt his lips moving. "Why me? Why are you doing this to me?"

Shuichi turned his face of up just enough for their noses to touch. "Because you need me. I don't want you to feel like this any more. Please, let me help you."

A single tear slid down his cheek as Eiri opened his eyes fully to stare into the deep violet ones in front of him. The pink haired healer wiped the salty tear away with his thumb and smiled softly.

Eiri didn't return the smile, but tilted his head and let his lips brush against the full pink ones still smiling. He had promised himself he would never do this again, but it felt... so warm and... so right.

Their lips pressed to each other more fully and the heat once again intensified.

Shu's hands began to slide from Eiri's cheeks into his hair and the hands on his shoulder blades pushed him closer to the strong chest of his blond ward.

Neither young man thought about what it was they were doing till the front door slammed open and a shout echoed through the apartment.

"Aniki! I brought pizza! I hope you like jalapeno and pepperoni- oh! Um... hello?" Tatsuha rounded the corner to find a scowling Eiri and a blushing pink haired boy.

"Tatsuha." What had he been thinking? He can't let anyone close to him again. Not after... Just no.

"Hi Tatsuha! I'm Shuichi, do you remember me?" He could still feel his blushing cheeks and knew his lips were pinker than normal, but he couldn't care less. Eiri had accepted his help, whether he liked it or not.

The dark haired boy took a closer look at the new person and let his astonishment show. "You're the guy from the ER! You're the one that-"

"-Was just leaving. Say good bye, Shuichi." Eiri interrupted and grabbed the smiling boy by the arm and began to drag him to the door.

"Ow, Eiri! That hurts." Shuichi didn't really care if he left bruises, but it would seem rather odd to smile widely while being physically thrown out of someone's home.

"Don't care." Eiri threw the door open and tossed his pink haired healing guest out of his apartment. "Thank you for the visit, please don't come back." Then shut it hard with an echoing slam.

Shuichi caught himself just before he landed face first but continued to smile. He knew Eiri wouldn't have reacted that way if he hadn't been startled. He also knew that Eiri was fighting some major demons. That much was true since he felt the influx of emotions after the blond and fully realized what they had just done.

Come to think of it... What had they just done?!

Suddenly, a sinking feeling, like a brick in the ocean, hit Shuichi directly in the stomach. He was only supposed to heal Eiri's soul not fall in love with him. Oh Shit!

Shuichi covered his mouth even though he hadn't said anything out loud. Then his hands slid up to cover his eyes and he shook his head from side to side. What had he just done?

* * *

"Jeez, Eiri. You didn't have to be such a dick and throw the poor kid out just cause I caught you two necking." Tatsuha had long since seated himself in Shuichi's vacated spot and started to work his way through half of a large pizza.

Sighing heavily, Eiri took a large gulp from his beer. "We were not 'necking'."

"Sure looked that way to me." Tatsuha stopped stuffing his face and ran a finger over a yellow blossom. "He brought these for you?" At Eiri's distracted nod, Tatsuha stood up and began to fill a vase he found under the sink with water. "They... remind me of you."

Tearing his eyes away from staring off into space and trying to forget the last hour of his life, Eiri watched as his little brother carefully trimmed each stem to the perfect length and arranged the flowers in a vase he didn't even remember buying. "So I've been told."

Tatsuha nodded distractedly and placed the flower arrangement in the center of the table then sat down with a thoughtful frown in his face.

"I begged him." He said suddenly.

Eiri glanced at his brother. "Begged who?"

Turning his face to look his brother in the eye, Tatsuha said, "Shuichi."

At his brother's puzzled look, Tatsuha continued. "He just appeared out of nowhere in the hospital ER."

He propped his chin on the heel of his hand and turned back to look at the flowers. "I... just grabbed him and begged him to help you. Thinking back on it, I don't even know why I did that. He wasn't wearing scrubs, or anything."

The dark haired boy slid his gaze from the happy yellow flowers to his slightly frowning brother. "But he helped you anyway." He stood up with a small smile and grabbed one last slice of pizza before he headed for the door. "I'm glad I got to meet him again. Next time, I'll have to thank him."

Then he was gone, leaving Eiri to frown in thought at the pleasant little flowers.

* * *

Shuichi sat on the train frowning in thought. He really hoped God and Gabriel weren't upset with him.

He really hoped he could still help Eiri's soul heal.

He really hoped he would be allowed to love Eiri and heal his soul.

With a heavy sigh, he sunk down in his seat as the train stopped and emptied down to only him and a couple of other riders. This wasn't the most popular time to ride the train so it was relatively quiet.

A warm familiar hand fell on his shoulder and Shuichi didn't even have to look up to see who it was. "Hey Gabriel."

The Archangel was dressed in a pair of blue jeans, a red tee-shirt, and a blue jean jacket. He took the vacant seat on Shuichi's right and looked at his new friend in worry. "Shu-chan? Is something bothering you?"

He was met with a wet sniffle and a hiccup. The angel wrapped his arm around Shuichi's shoulders and pulled him into a comforting hug. "It's alright, Shuichi. Tell me what's wrong."

"I -hic- love him." Shuichi let the tears stream down his face as his strong angelic friend rubbed his arm comfortingly. "Are you still -sniffle- going to let me help him?"

He looked up into Gabriel's deep brown eyes and practically pleaded with him. _Please let me stay and help Eiri._

A quiet laugh broke Shuichi out of his silent pleading. "Of course, Sweetie! Why would you think that would be a problem?"

Shuichi straightened and stared at his friend in disbelief. "You mean this doesn't ruin His Plan or anything?"

The brown haired angel tilted his head to the side. "Well, it wasn't part of His Plan from the beginning, but when He saw it happening it became a joyful little bonus."

"You mean," Shuichi swallowed nervously, "it doesn't matter to Him that we're both guys?"

Gabriel shook his head with a wide smile. "Nope! Love is always beautiful and welcome, no matter what form it's in."

The smile that lit Shuichi's face then was astounding. He lunged forward and practically strangled the air out of his angel friend. "I'm so glad! I was so afraid that I wouldn't be allowed to stay and help Eiri heal his soul."

"I'm glad you're happy about this Shu-chan, but this is your stop." Gabriel chuckled as Shuichi unlatched himself and gathered up his bag, darted for the closing doors, and squeezed through just before they slammed shut.

Before the train began to slide away Shuichi turned around and waved to Gabriel just as the Archangel disappeared leaving an empty seat behind.

It seemed as though a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders even though Shuichi knew he had his work cut out for him. Eiri was going to fight him kicking and screaming, but Shu could tell that the blonde haired man really was hurting and wanted, more than anything, to feel alive again.

Nodding to himself, Shuichi made his way down the street to his apartment and thought back the kiss he had shared in Eiri's kitchen.

It had been burning, but gentle. Though it had come as a shock to Shuichi that he had an influx of power surge through him just as the kiss intensified, it had still be one of the most memorable events in his life.

The serge of energy scared him. If he couldn't control his energy correctly he might have a harder time healing Eiri than he thought. The kiss, though, had been amazing.

The startled ending of it and consequent throwing out after it couldn't dull the kiss's beauty in Shuichi's mind. The warmth, the heat, the calm he could feel radiating from Eiri made any embarrassment worth it.

He would give anything to feel those content and soothing emotions instead of despair and depression. Anything.

* * *

A/N: Ok, so, I haven't updated in like forever. I got severely distracted and disinterested until just recently when I finished Buoyancy vs. Gravity is less than a week. Now that that is done, I can focus some of my energy on Angelic Conception! This was a wonderfully inspired story and reading it brought it back to life for me. I have altered the plot somewhat in my plans to help it flow better. I think it should be getting really good really soon! Hope you enjoyed it and don't forget to review! Tell me everything you love about it!

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	7. Sharing is Caring

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

Chapter 7: Sharing is Caring

* * *

It is strange. This place seems almost familiar. Like I've seen it somewhere before; in another dream perhaps?

The sound of bare feet on wooden floors, strangely enough, brought the dream, no _memory_, to mind.

This was that dream again; that nightmare again. It's never lost its vividness. Not in... six years of the same scene over and over again had it lost any of it's horror.

"_What are you doing here, Eiri-kun?"_

He still looks just as amazing and mature as he did that afternoon. When will you age Yuki?

_The tall handsome man, Yuki Kitazawa, hastily set the cocked and loaded pistol back down on the coffee table away from his temple. Sixteen year old Eiri watched as his older cousin picked up a half empty bottle and took a great swig from it. _

"_I wanted to go over this report I finished with you, cousin." _Oh, but I was so naive. I was so naïve and looked up to him so much that I couldn't even see it... in his eyes.

_Yuki looked young Eiri up and down. He had watched as his younger cousin's body filled out and his affection for him as a role model grew. Yuki had watched and enjoyed the attentions. That is until tonight. _

"_You should go home, Eiri." He had finally gotten up the nerve to end his miserable life and he didn't want his starry-eyed little cousin to keep him from his task. _

Why didn't I just go home?

"_But Yuki... I thought that-"_

"_You know, Eiri-kun." Yuki took another large swig of the bottle and stared off into space as if he was the only one in the room. "You have grown to be quite beautiful."_

That's right. That's why I didn't go home. I never got the chance to go home.

_An immense flash of pain seemed to rip young Eiri apart. He's bitten his lip till it's bled and his nails have long since etched painful ridges into the hard wood of his older cousin's living floor. _

_The pain of betrayal and the smell of blood are almost enough to make him split apart and empty his stomach right there. _

_The ripped fabric of his shirt hung loosely off his shoulders and his blood stained trousers pooled at his bent knees. Oh God it hurts so much..._

It still hurts... God, why did it have to hurt so much? When will it stop hurting?

"_Do you like that Eiri-kun? Isn't this what you wanted?"_

No, it wasn't... never this. I wanted your friendship, acceptance. I never wanted this, Yuki.

"_Please, s-stop! It hurts! You're h-hurting me!" Young Eiri screamed. His whole body hurt. He couldn't make himself numb. He couldn't think of anything other than the betrayal and humiliation that was being thrust upon him. _

Stop it... please stop. Why won't you stop hurting me?

_Finally, it stopped. _

_Yuki pulled away and straightened himself then kicked the trembling and crying Eiri to the floor. "I told you to go home."_

_Eiri used the last remained ebbs of his strength to pull himself up and clutch to the end of the coffee table. All he wanted to do was go home. _

_A glint of metal caught his eye. _

"_Do you want more?!" Yuki was drunk. He voice was slurred and he had long since lost himself to his inner despair. "Fine. I'll give you what you want."_

_But before he could take a step closer to the silently crying teenager, a shot rang out. Then another and another till six echoes filled the air and rang in the ears of the still sobbing and shaking young boy. _

_Yuki laid on the hard wood floor, six bullet holes to the chest, blood seeping to pool on the stained wood. _

_Finally he could stop hurting._

Why hasn't it stopped hurting yet?

* * *

Shuichi shot up in bed to the sound of piercing scream and his best friend frantically trying to shake him awake.

Sweat was pouring down his body and his entire being was in intense pain and shaking.

"Shuichi! Holy shit! Are you alright?" Hiro was almost frantic. He had never heard his friend utter such a heart piecing sound before. It had shaken him to his very core and shaved a good five years off his life.

All the trembling, pink haired healer could think about was the pain. He had felt it as if he was being ripped apart. As if it had been him in that nightmare. _Eiri..._

Turning his head toward his friend abruptly, he asked, "Hiro? Are you alright?"

"Me?" Hiro asked while running his unsteady hands through his hair. "Yea, I'm fine. You just gave me a heart attack, is all."

Shuichi cupped his best friend's cheek and let a little of his power ease the fright still coursing through Hiro then lunged out of bed. "I'm sorry, Hiro, but I have to go somewhere! I'll call you in the morning, I promise."

The warmth and calm made Hiro content to go along with anything his friend said. "Sure, Shu. Be careful."

Watching to make sure his friend was safely in bed and asleep, Shuichi hurriedly threw on the first thing he could grab.

He had just enough presence of mind to grab his wallet, back pack, and keys before bolting out the door.

* * *

Eiri hadn't felt this shaken by that nightmare in a long time. It was the first time he'd had it since he was released from his last hospital stay. Since then he either didn't dream or he dreamt fragmented images of violet, orange, pink, warmth, and calm.

The bile rose in his throat once again and he lurched forward into the toilet. The moment he woke up, he had just barely made it in time. Now, he had been bent over the toilet for close to thirty minutes.

Finally it seemed as though there was nothing left in his stomach to give up, but dry heaves. He shakily got to his feet and was in the middle of drowning himself under the faucet when a frantic knocking reached his ringing ears.

Stumbling to the door, he looked to check the time: _4:28._

Who in their right mind would take him away from the relative safety of the bathroom to answer the door at this time of night?

The moment he open the door his question was answered.

Shuichi shot forward and wrapped his arms around Eiri's neck, pressing every possible inch of their bodies together.

"It's alright, Eiri." He whispered to the suddenly shaking man. "I'm here. It'll be alright."

Without really knowing how, Eiri found himself on his couch clutching the smaller man to him like a life raft. He was shaking and could feel the cold prick at him with needle sharp fingers. "Shuichi..."

"I know." Shuichi soothed. He began to rub Eiri's trembling back as the familiar orange glow chased away the cold. "I'm here. Let it out."

The soothing warmth was returning and Eiri could feel the queasiness in his stomach ease. The tears still streamed down his face, but he no longer felt encased in knives of ice. He loosened his grip on Shuichi, but shifted into a more comfortable position.

Shuichi gently pulled Eiri down to lay next to him on the couch. The blond man buried his face into Shuichi's neck and kept his arms wrapped securely around the healer's body.

The steady orange glow in the darkened apartment, steady pulse under his ear and the steady soothing strokes of the small hands on his back chased Eiri's fright and pain away, if only for a little while.

It was only after Eiri's tears had dried and his breathing evened out, that he asked, "How did you know?"

Shuichi let the fingers of one hand burry themselves into the blonde's hair to massage his scalp. "I saw every thing. I woke up screaming and nearly scared my roommate to death."

That brought a halfway amused scoff from the taller man before he sobered. "You shouldn't have seen that."

The pink haired man turned his body further toward his ward and wrapped his arms tighter around him. "I'm glad that I saw it. It will help me heal you."

They lapsed into silence once again till Eiri shifted and buried his face deeper into Shuichi's chest. "Mika showed up just after..."

Shuichi threaded his fingers through Eiri's blond hair and stroked his scalp in soothing motions, silently urging him to continue.

Taking a deep breath Eiri said, "Mika's my older sister. She was about eighteen at the time. I was... sixteen." He broke off and took a couple of deep breaths of Shuichi's scent. The healer smelled of sleep and something spicy-sweet.

It became severely clear to Eiri then that he was curled up on his couch with someone he barely knew and discussing an event that Mizuki had to drag out of him with a team of rabid horses.

Eiri didn't find the situation as awkward or as painful as he normally would have. Something about Shuichi and his amazingly warm hands, his orange glow, his smell, it all soothed him like nothing else had.

Deciding to kick the little brat out later, he let Shuichi wrap him tighter in his amazing warmth. He let his head rest over Shuichi's heart listening to its rhythm and feeling the rise and fall of his chest.

"Why is it so easy for you to do this?"

Mulling the question over in his pink head, Shuichi laid his cheek on top of Eiri's golden hair. "I was born to do this. I wouldn't normally have this affect on people, but you're special to me." _More than you know._

Eiri grunted and let the subject drop. The sound of Shuichi's steady heart beat and his gently stroking hands began to lull him into a light sleep, but before he drifted off completely he murmured, "You barely know me. How could I be special when we've only met three week's ago?"

Smiling softly, Shuichi whispered into a now slumbering ear, "It only took one look, Eiri. One look and you're more important to me than anything."

* * *

It came as a surprise to be woken up at the crack of dawn by Eiri's front door bursting open and his older sister and brother-in-law shouting at the top of their lungs, "Eiri, get up! It's time for breakfast!"

Eiri jolted up and almost slid off the couch and the extremely warm body he was wrapped around. When he realized he wasn't being robbed, he dropped his had back down to Shuichi's chest and muttered, "Fuck."

That had been the second time in four hours that Shuichi had been startled out of his sleep and his heart was paying the price. It was slamming against his chest like a jack rabbit. "Do all your siblings just burst into your home like that?"

The blond was rubbing at his throbbing temples. The combination of not having cried in three years and being yanked out of possibly the most restful sleep he's had in just as many, was taking a toll on his nerves.

Warm finger tips slid under his and easily soothed away the ache. With a relieved sigh Eiri climbed off of his guest and stumbled toward the kitchen where his devil siblings were making coffee. "What the fuck are you two doing here this early in the morning?!"

"Eiri!" Mika screeched. "It's almost eight o'clock."

"Like I said; what the fuck are you doing here?" If his sister and her husband had been paying attention they would have seen the storm brewing in his golden eyes, but of course they weren't.

"Eiri, that's not a nice thing to say to your sister." That happy voice chirped from just behind Eiri and caused all the clattering and kitchen noises to come to a grinding halt.

Shuichi stepped out from behind the irate blond and smiled warmly at the open mouthed husband and wife. "Good morning, Mika-san." He gave respectful bow and turned to Tohma who was looking at him as if he were a ticking time bomb.

"I don't think we've met." Shuichi was still smiling though he could feel the hostility wafting off of Eiri in waves. "I'm Shuichi Shindou, a friend of Eiri's." He gave another bow.

Tohma snapped himself out of his stupor and returned the bow hesitantly. "Tohma Seguchi. I'm sorry, but how do you know Eiri?"

* * *

"So, you met Eiri at the hospital three months ago when he offered to watch your cat?"

Mika and Tohma were both having problems reconciling their surly younger brother with the nice man that offers to watch hospital worker's pets. It just seemed like too much of a jump from this scowling, hissing, spitting blond sitting at his kitchen table.

"Yep!" Shuichi chirped as he took another sip from his steaming, extra sugared coffee. "Little One just took to him like that!" And he snapped his fingers for emphasis.

Tohma took a slow bite from his muffin and asked, "Little One?"

Shuichi blushed slightly and scratched at the back of his head. "Yeah, I had just found her in an alley way and I didn't really know what to call her. I couldn't just leave her to starve."

Mika was trying hard not to gape at her brother's strange house guest. He was dressed in pajama pants and an over sized t-shirt with the collar cut off. He was polite, nice, cheery, and from the sounds of it, caring and kind too. This could not be one of Eiri's friends.

"You work at the hospital?"

Shuichi nodded and ignore the slight darkening of the feelings coming from his companion. "I work as a receptionist in the ER and Admissions."

Eiri was getting thoroughly frustrated. His siblings were looking at both him and Shuichi like they were aliens from outer space and their scrutiny was even making the little healer uncomfortable. "Are you two going to leave now? You've already made sure I haven't killed myself, so your self appointed job is done."

All eyes turned to Eiri. He hadn't spoken at all during his sibling's twenty minute interrogation.

"Eiri," Shuichi frowned. He wasn't quite sure what he was feeling from the older man but it wasn't welcoming. "They came all this way to see you. The least you can do is let them finish their coffee."

"No!" Eiri jumped out of his seat throwing his chair across the floor with a clatter. "I have had one hell of a night and I want all of you out of my house!"

Mika had been startled so severely by the out burst that she had spilt her coffee on the table top. "Eiri, we only want to-"

"OUT!" Eiri pointed in the general direction of his front door and shut his eyes tight against the migraine that was eating away at his last never.

Tohma set his cup down in the table and stood slowly. Placing a hand on his wife's shoulder he said, "Come now, Mika. We came here to check on Eiri and we've done that." He chanced a look at the suddenly very pale Shuichi. "Let's leave Eiri and his friend alone for the rest of the morning."

Mika slowly rose and gathered her purse then she and her husband left without saying another word.

Shuichi was battling an extreme wave of nausea. Eiri's out burst had broken his cracking walls and he was fighting hard not to lose the little bit of muffin he had consumed right there in the kitchen.

Finally, after he heard his front door close with a quiet click, Eiri gingerly opened his eyes and turned to glance at his remaining house guest.

Shuichi was pale, a sheen of sweat beading on his forehead. His hands were shaking were they clasped his coffee mug in a death grip. He didn't dare to breathe out of his mouth for fear that his breakfast would come up with his air.

He figured it was just his lack of sleep that was making his shields weak against Eiri's emotions, but then again his siblings just might bring out the worst in him.

The fierceness of their malicious barrage in his senses had been steadily increasing since they had stepped thought the door. Shu had tried to ignore it. He had tried to let the caffeine in the coffee perk up his energy, but the longer he had been sitting next to Eiri the worse it got. Now it just seemed to be too much.

Covering his mouth with a trembling hand he mumbled, "Bathroom- Eiri!"

He was scooped up in strong arms and quickly raced to the bathroom where he emptied his entire stomach into the toilet.

Eiri didn't know what to think. The cheery pink headed brat was now throwing up in his bathroom for no apparent reason. He had seemed fine during the inquisition-like breakfast, but just after his out burst he had suddenly...

Shuichi finished his last dry heave and promptly collapsed backwards against the porcelain tub. "I'm sorry." He whispered. He was definitely going to have to kill Gabriel for not putting a warning label on this job.

Sighing heavily, the blond man bent down and scooped him up. He gingerly placed his still slightly trembling burden on his couch and returned to the kitchen for a glass of water.

"Drink." Eiri handed the pink haired man the glass. "Then, I think you had better explain." He frowned when Shuichi gave him a wide eyed look. "Everything."

* * *

A/N: I kept feeling like there should be more to this chapter, but I feel like this is perfect. I hope you all enjoy!

8


	8. Sgt Gabriel's Lonely Hearts Club Band

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

**Chapter 08: Sergeant Gabriel's Lonely Hearts Club Band**

* * *

Little One batted at Rumiko's apron strings as she bustled about the kitchen. The little kitten had come to stay with her and Charlie not too long ago and had already been wrecking havoc upon her small apartment. The things she does for her son.

Charlie strolled into the room with his face buried in an instruction manual. "Rumiko, I have no idea how to put that blasted thing together." They had purchased an entertainment station to set their television and other assorted electronics on, but had yet to figure out which pegs go in which holes.

"Are you reading the directions?" Rumiko didn't look up from her bubbling pot. Men never read the manuals.

"Damn it woman! Of course I'm reading the instructions! They're just so confusing!" Charlie threw the booklet onto the kitchen table and stomped his feet much like a child would.

Spinning around with fire in her eyes, Rumiko shouted, "Don't you get mad at me, Mister! If it were up to me we wouldn't even have bought that damned thing!"

Charlie growled and Rumiko hissed. They stood in the kitchen, the booklet lying between them, staring each other down. Rumiko's sauce spoon was poised for attack and Charlie was crouched ready to spring.

"You know," A smooth voice said from the head of the table, "It's not good for the blood pressure to get so mad."

Charlie and Rumiko jumped in surprise and turned to stare at a frowning Gabriel.

"How did you…" Charlie stopped mid question then just shook his head at the smiling Angel. "Never mind. I'll be in the living room."

Rumiko watched her friend walk out of the room before turning an annoyed scowl at her unexpected guest. "It's impolite to eavesdrop."

"God said the exact same thing to me the other day." Gabriel tapped his chin and gave the scowling woman an innocent smirk.

Giving a suffering sigh, Rumiko turned back to her sauce pot. "What brings you here, Gabriel? Aren't you supposed to be watching over my son?"

"I am a master at multitasking." The angel stood up and sauntered over to the stove to sniff at the delicious smelling pots and pans. "Rumi-chan, would you mind too terribly if I stayed for dinner?"

Not even bothering to look at her guest's big brown puppy eyes, Rumiko shook her spoon at him. "It's rude to invite yourself to dinner as well. Don't they teach you guardians' manners?"

"Yeah," Gabriel dipped a finger into a pot and sucked the dripping morsel from his finger, "but I slept through that class. Man, was it boring!"

Rubbing at her throbbing temples, Rumiko turned to face the tall handsome angel. "Is there a reason you're here, other than to annoy me?"

Gabriel took on a serious face. "As you know, Shu-chan is helping Eiri-chan mend his dying soul." Rumiko nodded. "It's taking quite a bit of a toll on him. There isn't really anything I can do about that."

"What do you mean, nothing you can do?!" Rumiko practically shouted. "He's your ward! You're supposed to protect him!"

"Calm down, Rumiko." Gabriel placed comforting hands on Rumiko's shoulders. "I can't help him because we aren't exactly sure why it's happening. We have some theories of how to help it, but before we figure out how it's happening then we can't stop it completely."

Taking a deep breath, the worried mother asked, "What exactly is happening to Shuichi?"

"It seems that the stress of shielding himself from Eiri's poisonous inner emotions and baring the burden alone is affecting his health." Gabriel frowned. "He's loosing weight and sleep."

The pink haired woman practically collapsed into the chair already pulled out from the kitchen table. _He said this wasn't going to kill my baby_. "You said he's loosing weight."

The Archangel nodded. "He's having problems because he's bearing the burden alone." Again the angel nodded. "Would it help if I offered to talk to him? Listen to him?"

Gabriel's face broke into a stunning smile. "That would be perfect! And feed him too. Young men these days never eat what they are supposed to."

Rumiko smiled at him and felt her fear slowly ebbing away. Now that she had a way of helping, Shuichi's predicament wasn't quite so scary to her. "Thanks for coming and telling me, Gabriel."

The tall angel winked. "What are Guardians for, but to help those they guard?" And without waiting for a reply, he disappeared with a soft pop.

Rumiko sighed heavily. She was so worried about her baby.

"Holy shit!" Charlie's surprised shout from the living room sent her racing through the door.

"What?! What happened?" Rumiko clutched the door frame as her heart hammered from the surprise.

Charlie was kneeling of the floor, manual in one hand, screw driver in the other staring at a complete and erect entertainment station. "It just 'popped' up!" Charlie exclaimed. "I look away for a second and then 'poof!' it's there."

Rumiko smiled and headed back to the kitchen, leaving a bewildered Charlie staring at the completed shelving unit in wonder. Gabriel was certainly one of a kind.

* * *

"Drink." Eiri handed the glass to Shuichi. "Then explain." He frowned when Shuichi gave him a wide eyed look. "Everything."

With a sigh of his own, Shuichi sipped at the glass of water till his churning stomach settled and his shields built up strength. "I... I can feel your emotions. I can feel them as if they were mine."

Those simple words hit the blond like a wave. Eiri let him self sink down onto his coffee table and stared at the pink haired healer in disbelief. Then things started to come together.

_In the hospital._ Shuichi had acted like he was deathly ill and fled like a bat out of hell during their confrontation just after... After he burst into the ER without any warning and saved Eiri's life.

He always knew when Eiri needed warmth. Over the last few days, Shuichi had been showing up at his apartment at random and often severely _convenient_ times. Shuichi had even come to comfort him after the dream.

Bolting up from his seat Eiri backed away. "You-... you can feel my emotions."

_Panic. Flight. Anger. Protectiveness. _Shuichi struggled to hold up his shield. Eiri's emotions weren't as strong as before, but Shu's stomach flopped about nonetheless. "Eiri, it's alright."

Standing shakily up, Shuichi took a step toward the retreating author. He knew this would happen. He knew he should have tried to keep it a secret longer. Reaching out, Shuichi laid his hand gently on Eiri's upper arm. "Eiri, please calm down."

Jerking away from the touch, Eiri almost yelled, "How can you?! How can you sit there like this is normal? You're fucking shaking!" He couldn't tell what disturbed him more; his obvious harmful affect on the small pink haired man or the blatant invasion on his privacy. No body was supposed to know what he was feeling; no body.

With the last ebbs of Shu's control, he launched himself at the distraught blonde for the second time in two days and held on tightly. "I can because I choose to. Please don't push me away." He buried his face into Eiri's heaving chest. "I want to help you. I _need _to help you! Let me."

The warmth of the orange glow returned, but Eiri was totally out of reach of the weakened healing. Shuichi was thrown off of him and landed ungracefully on the couch. "Eiri! Please!" He was fighting back tears. "Let me help you!"

His body was shaking and his vision was beginning to swim. If he didn't either get as far away from Eiri was possible or get the distraught man to calm down, Shuichi knew he was going to black out.

As if he could tell Shuichi was struggling so viciously with his own control, Eiri forced himself to calm. Taking a deep breath he let it out in almost a whisper. "Get out."

The tears were dripping one by one from Shuichi's eyes now. He knew Eiri was frightened of hurting him, he knew Eiri was afraid to let him past his blockades, and he knew that Eiri was now filled with even more festering emotions that were tearing him up inside.

"Please, Eiri." Shuichi fisted his hands and closed his eyes to keep the rest of his tears from pouring down his pale cheeks. "I just want to help you live again."

"I said get out." Eiri's voice was low and dangerous. His head was spinning, it seemed almost as though his world had been turned upside down. He stood there, brow furrowed in a fearsome scowl, arms straight at his side, hands tightly clenched into fists and shoulders set.

Shuichi looked up at the tall man he had come to love and felt his heart break. There was so much pain and he had made it worse. He had made his Eiri hurt.

Nodding in silence Shuichi stood slowly and waited for his watery legs to gain balance before bending to pick up his back pack and walking slowly and deliberately toward the door.

He turned around to see Eiri still standing in the same position in the same spot, his eyes now closed. Shuichi sent one last tendril of healing power out to him before closing the door and collapsing in the hall; the tears finally free to stream down his cheeks unchecked scorching hot.

* * *

"Shuichi?" Rumiko had opened her door to the sight of her red eyed and pale faced son.

Shuichi sniffled and wiped at his damp face with his sweater sleeve. "Hey, Mom. Can I come in?"

Rumiko nodded and stepped aside to allow her upset son in. Shaking her head, she followed him into the kitchen. _Oh, Shuichi. What has happened to you?_

* * *

"He just kicked me out Mama! I didn't know what to do." Shuichi shoved his hands into his disheveled pink hair and pulled on its roots. "I just made him worse"

Saddened by her son's heart ache and disappointment Rumiko tugged his hands away from his hair and stroked his bangs away from his forehead. "It'll be alright, baby. He'll cool down and in a few days everything will be back to normal."

Closing his eyes and letting his mother's soothing ministrations ease some of his strife, Shuichi moaned, "But I'm supposed to be helping him move forward, not back and then to the same place he was!"

Rumiko sighed and wrapped her arm around his shoulders, pulling him to her chest. "I know Shu-bug, but sometimes there are set backs and the only thing you can do is wait for it to get fixed before working ahead."

Shuichi buried his face in Rumiko's shoulder and clutched at her apron like a life line. "I… I love him, Mama. And it hurts that I caused him pain."

The middle aged mother's soothing strokes halted abruptly and Shuichi pulled away to look into his mother's stunned face. "I've fallen in love with him. I don't know what to do."

Suddenly it all became so very clear.

It didn't bother her that her son was in love with another man. Actually she had guessed he didn't exactly like women since he had started puberty. There are just some things a mother knows before her child.

No, she wasn't upset about his choice to fall in love with Eiri Uesugi. She was worried that his affections couldn't possibly be returned and he would be more broken hearted than he was at this very moment. That was a pain she didn't want him to bear.

_Everything is going to be alright, Rumi-chan. _A laughing, bouncy voice echoed through her head. She suppressed the urge to look up and scowl.

Turing to look into her son's worried and tearful eyes, Rumiko placed her hands on the sides of his face and pulled him forward to place a warm, comforting kiss upon his forehead.

"Don't worry, Shuichi." She smiled down at him, his eyes wide. "I love you no matter what. I'm just afraid that you'll get hurt." Shuichi was pulled into his mother's strong arms and let a small relieved smile etch at his mouth as he hugged her back with just as much force.

It was like a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. He had finally revealed his troubles and worries to someone who fully understood. He had finally told one of the most important people in his life that he was in love. He felt as though the frayed seams of his self were being sewn back together. The stress was finally lessening and he felt as though he could breathe again.

"Thank you, Mama." He buried his face in her wavy pink hair. "I love you."

"Love you too, Shu-baby." She pulled back and combed through his messy pink hair with her fingers. "Now let's get you something to eat! You look like you're about to blow away!"

The mother and son laughed with each other as Rumiko went about finishing up lunch. Neither aware of their unexpected eavesdropper.

Charlie stepped away from his place next to the kitchen doorway with a gently smile on his lips.

He felt as though Shuichi was his own son and he was glad that he wasn't holding everything in or having to deal with this all on his own.

There had always been something different about Shuichi and Charlie could never quite put his finger on it. The boy had the ability to sooth just about everyone with a gentle touch, the uncanny ability of picking out those in need and the inevitable drive to help them.

Shuichi's strange out bursts, his healing abilities, and the appearances of an Angel were just some of the mysteries Charlie was waiting to be solved. He would do anything for this mother and her son that had taken him in and he was ready to help them in any way possible.

After all, they were his family too, and you must protect and support you and yours.

* * *

Gabriel looked down on the small apartment from a cloud high in the sky with a satisfied smile on his lips. He knew Shuichi was in good loving hands with Rumiko, obviously, but he was also completely taken with a little match making scheme taking form in his bouncy head.

"Gabriel." A disapproving voice chimed from behind his stooped form, making Gabriel jump in surprise. "You know that you're not supposed to interfere with anyone else, but your charge."

Scowling over his shoulder at his fellow archangel, Gabriel stuck his tongue out in defiance. "Stop being such a goody two shoes, Peter. Charlie and Rumiko would be so cute together and you know it!"

Giving a sigh of long suffering, Peter rolled his eyes. "That's not the point. God bestowed a job upon us to do and playing match maker is not it."

Grumbling, Gabriel stood up and turned from the looking cloud. "You're no fun."

Ignoring his companions grouching, Peter turned and led the way back to the cloud palace lab. "Beside," he said over his shoulder, "You know it's already written in the stars for them. Why can't you just be patient?"

Crossing his arms, Gabriel replied, "It'll take them forever at the rate they're going! I just wanted to give them a little push."

Their conversation halted when they stepped through the doors of the laboratory. Walking away from the stern angel, Gabriel looked over a technician's shoulder to peer at the celestial computer screen. "How are the readouts, Teresa?"

The young angel leaned back on her pedestal, frowning. "It's better, but our Shuichi isn't making much headway. Eiri-san is so stubborn. He's fighting tooth and nail."

"It seems," Jonas, from the work station across from Teresa, chimed in, "That the darkness and despair has taken more of a hold than we had originally thought."

"I had figured as much when poor Shu-chan practically passed out the first time he had taken a full hit from Eiri-chan's emotions." Gabriel rubbed at his chin in thought.

"What are the emptiness ratios?" Peter asked; his hands filled with what looked like seismograph readouts.

Timothy, the angel examining a slide underneath a stratus made microscope looked up from the eye piece and shuffled through some notes. "Let's see... _utter despair_ has lessoned by 12% while _loneliness_ has just increased at 23%, thankfully _the will to live_ hasn't been yo-yoing since the 'sleeping pill-scotch incident'."

The young angel scowled as a machine to his right beeped and spit out several sheets of data. Looking at the fresh readout, he sighed. "_Self hatred_ and _self inflicted feelings of isolation_ just increased by 15%."

The angels' shoulders slumped. This job was one of the most difficult they had had to tackle in a little over fifty years.

Placing his palms together, Gabriel took a deep breath and squared his shoulders in determination. He wouldn't let Shuichi or Eiri down. There had to be something they could do. There had to be something that they weren't thinking of.

"Alright, guys. Keep working. You're all doing great. Let's keep the momentum going! We can't let Shuichi and Eiri down!" Gabriel rallied the troops and gave out orders.

"Jonas, keep a close eye on that festering blackness. I want to know the moment it changes."

"Yes sir! Gabriel sir!" The red headed angel gave a snappy salute and set about his task with renewed purpose.

"Teresa, continue to monitor Eiri's energy levels and Shuichi's power intake/output. Make sure you don't miss a single thing."

"Got it Captain." Her tightly tied pony tail swayed as she turned back to her bank of computers with a scowl of concentration.

"Timothy, track Eiri's fluctuations and ratios along with Shuichi's heartstrings." Already immersed in his job, the brown haired angel grunted in affirmation.

Turning toward his blond partner and friend, Gabriel looked fierce and sure. "Peter."

"I've got it covered, Gabriel." Gabriel gave his friend a thankful smile, acknowledging his friend's unspoken reassurances. Peter simply nodded, stern face never wavering.

Striding toward the door to the laboratory, Gabriel called over his shoulder, "I want those reports in my hands when I get back. We can't let them down!" before he jumped into the air and soared off toward his next destination.

His wings flapping comfortingly, Gabriel clinched his fists in resolve. This may be one of the most difficult jobs He had ever charged him with, but Gabriel had vowed to assist Shuichi and Eiri in anyway he could and he never goes back on his word.

They would prevail.

* * *

A/N: That bit with the angels was a surprise to me, but I'm thoroughly happy with it! Gabriel is one of my favorite OCs I've come up with. I hope you all enjoyed it! Please Review!

7


	9. Coffee? Tea? Me?

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

**Chapter 9: Coffee? Tea? Me?**

* * *

Shuichi sighed heavily and dragged his feet as Hiro tugged him toward their favorite coffee house.

The last week had been absolute hell.

It was as if he was going through Eiri withdrawals. He constantly felt shaky and tense. He'd wake up in the middle of the night cold with sweat and shivering. He couldn't quite tell if he was projecting Eiri's own feelings or if he was coming down with a bad case of the flu, but he hated it.

After spending the night back in his old room at his mother's apartment Shu returned to his own apartment to find Hiro sitting shirtless on the couch, hair messed, and cordless phone clutched in his hand.

Automatically assuming that his friend had spent the last two days waiting for him to call and tell him he was still alive Shuichi woke him and apologized profusely. Hiro, not having the heart to tell him he had been enjoying the peace and quiet, naturally forgave him and quickly pried the details of the last forty eight hours from him.

Once his story was finished Shuichi felt ten times worse and left to his bedroom to brood appropriately and try not to cry himself to sleep.

It was Friday, finally, and Hiro refused to watch his friend stumble around in a stupor any longer.

"Come on Shu. I know you're excited about getting your coffee flavored coffee with coffee flavored cream and brown sugar. You know? The one you always beg me to let you buy and the one I never let you buy."

Reluctantly letting Hiro drag him toward the Flying Saucer, Shuichi mustered up a small smile for his worried friend. "You'll really let me get it this time?"

"Sure." _Maybe without the extra sugar._ "Definitely."

When Hiro had turned his attention back on the path ahead of them Shuichi let his half hearted smile drop. Sometimes he was simply just exhausted.

The time he was spending away from Eiri seemed to be more draining than the time he spent in with him. They had a palpable link that was sucking his energy just to keep it alive.

The feelings he had been bombarded with the last time he was with Eiri had scared him and he wouldn't let the link fade for even a moment. He didn't want Eiri to try anything and be lost forever. Though he doubted Gabriel would let that happen he still didn't want to take any chances.

Eiri had a history of accidents and Shuichi was certain that a few of them weren't accidents at all. He couldn't take the chance that he would lose Eiri.

A shiver ran down his spin. What a horrible thought. Eiri had become so much a part of his conscious that he didn't know what he would do if that presence suddenly disappeared. It was like Eiri grounded him, calmed him.

What a conundrum. He had always felt rushed and jittery, restless and waiting for something to happen. Eiri made him feel focused and took away the nonexistent distraction that had plagued him most of his life.

The bell at the top of the door jingled as Hiro pushed it open and Shuichi's arm was finally released. The smell of coffee and fresh baked pastries hit him like a calming wave. Going to the coffee used to be his absolute favorite thing.

His favorite: coffee flavored coffee with coffee flavored cream and brown sugar had always made his blood pump and his head buzz. The overload of caffeine had entertained Hiro and frightened him more than once. Today, though, Shuichi felt like a plain cup of coffee. He wasn't in the mood to run around like a chicken with its head cut off.

"Shuichi, I'm going to get a tart. Do you want anything to eat?"

Glancing toward the glass case, Shuichi surveyed every item. "The lemon bar looks good."

Hiro frowned and suddenly placed a hand on his forehead as if checking for a temperature. "Nope, no brain sizzling fever. Are you feeling alright Shu? You normally order the seven layered death by chocolate chocolate fudge cake."

Rolling his eyes, Shuichi just smile. "I don't particularly feel like have a sugar seizure today."

"Alright." Hiro sounded skeptical. As if he suspected his best friend had gotten abducted by pod people. "If that's what you want."

"It is." Shuichi smiled again and turned his attention back to the room. The line wasn't so unbelievably long but long enough that he had enough time to zone out while waiting his turn.

A little girl sitting in a plush club chair in one corner of the coffee house smiled sweetly at him before returning to his chocolate ice cream and completely ignoring her mother's whipping at her smudged face with a wet napkin.

A college student sitting at the bar in front of the window was engrossed in his lap top, black ear buds plugging his ears to the sounds around him. His girlfriend occupied much the same way.

There were so many different people in the coffee house and all of them independent to one another. All of them moving and talking and living around each other without a single connection to anyone else outside of their sphere of knowledge.

Without really thinking about it Shuichi opened his link with Eiri and let the older man's emotions flood him. It was an unconscious action he used to periodically check on his charge. A constant link will show you heavy, strong emotions, but a temporary flood of link will provide Shuichi with the little details.

It will make Shuichi _feel_ what Eiri is feeling.

Eiri was alone. Slightly cold in his dark and chilly apartment. Feet cold on the tile in the kitchen. The frost on the can of beer in his hand was melting under his skin and dripping to the top of his foot. Hair unwashed and stringy. Clothes wrinkled, apartment unkempt.

Chest empty.

"_Shuichi_?"

Gasping Shuichi shook his head, trying to rid himself of the sudden chill that had settled into the pit of his stomach.

"I'm sorry. I was just zoning off. Did you ask me something Hiro?"

"No." Hiro watched his friend closely. He had been "zoning off" a lot lately. "You just looked like you were in pain."

_I was._ "Nah. Just thinking about that inventory I have to do for Dr. K." Shuichi ran a hand through his messy pink hair.

"That man is insane." Hiro, satisfied with his friend's response faced forward once again. "I could have sworn he was following me around on Wednesday, looking over my shoulder while I did my job."

Smirking Shuichi mumbled, "I don't think he was looked anywhere near your shoulder." Ok, so his empathic powers had grown as of late. It wasn't a crime to look into the best interests of his friend, was it?

Hiro frowned in confusion and looked as if he was going to comment before the boy behind the counter called them up next.

Shuichi listened with half an ear while Hiro placed his order and stared off out the window at the people passing by on the street. He jumped in surprise when a familiar voice said, "And what will you have, Shuichi?"

Spinning his head around Shuichi's eyes grew wide and a smile peeked at his lips. "Tatsuha?"

* * *

"So," Hiro asked as he sipped at his coffee. "How do you two know each other?"

Tatsuha had requested his break after filling in Shuichi and Hiro's order and joined them at their table in one corner of the Flying Saucer.

"Shuichi, here, saved my big brother's life." He took a delicate sip from his bottle of juice.

Hiro glanced at a blushing and decidedly less happy Shuichi, before turning back to Tatsuha. "You're Eiri-san's brother?"

"Yep!" Tatsuha smiled. "Sadly enough I'm related to that big asshole."

"It's not nice to say those things about your brother." Shuichi's voice lacked conviction.

Hiro frowned at his friend. He had known something had been wrong with him for a whole week, but he was so subdued it was disturbing. "Shuichi, what is-" He was cut off as his phone suddenly began to vibrate and ring.

Pulling it out of his pocket and looking at the caller ID, Hiro cursed. "Shit, I'm sorry Shu. K just paged me. I have to go in and fix what ever mess he's just made with the filing system."

"That's alright, Hiro. I'll see you later at home, ok?" Shu was suddenly relieved that his best friend in the whole world was leaving. Hiro meant well but his constant supervision and attempts at cheering him up were tiring.

"Yeah, see you later." Hiro was already dialing K's number as he stood from his seat and headed toward the door. "And don't forget to eat something for dinner!" He called over his shoulder.

Shuichi waved dismissively after him and took another bite of his lemon bar.

"Is that guy your boyfriend?"

Shuichi choked and coughed spurring Tatsuha to pound on his back. "N-no! He's just my room mate!" He finally dislodged the bits of lemon bar from his breathing tube and gulped down some coffee.

"Just making sure, man." Tatsuha sat back with a small amused smirk that quickly faded away. "I hadn't seen you at Eiri's in a while."

Recovered from his episode, Shuichi sighed and looked down at his hands wrapped around his coffee mug. "That's because I haven't been there."

"What? Why not?" Tatsuha leaned closer and exclaimed vehemently. "Once you've saved a life you have a responsibility to watch out for it! Hadn't you ever heard of that?"

"Of course I've heard of it!" Shuichi almost shouted in frustration making people turn their heads toward their table. "Of course I've heard of it." He lowered his voice to almost a whisper.

"Tatsuha, Eiri kicked me out." He felt like he was close to tears. He didn't think the separation would be so hard on him. He really needed to talk to Gabriel. "I told him something I shouldn't have and he went crazy!"

Tatsuha watched in dismay as Shuichi threaded his fingers through his hair and tugged at the pink strands painfully. "It's been a week since I last saw him! I can't eat or sleep and I'm worried sick about him."

Leaning back in his chair Tatsuha whistled. "Man, you got it bad, don't you?"

"Yes, I love him, Tatsuha, but that's not it. I- I can't-… I'm supposed to be helping him! Healing him! But I just seem to be making it so much worse." He felt like the despair was going to consume him.

Tatsuha had little to no idea what he was talking about, but he knew it had something to do with the fact that Shuichi had magically brought his brother back from flat lining and by God, he was going to help this little pink haired man if it killed him.

"Shuichi, I think that not being with him, that abiding by his wishes is hurting you both way more than either of you think."

Shuichi stopped tugging at his hair and looked at Tatsuha in a mixture of confusion and hope. "You mean you… you don't mind that I'm in- in love with him?"

The other boy suddenly threw his head back and laughed so loud that everyone else in the coffee house glanced over in curiosity. "Why would I? It's not like Eiri's exactly straight himself, now is he?"

His pink head perked up. "What?"

"I said Eiri's not into women. Oh, he thinks he's into women and lets everyone else think he's into women but he's not. Hasn't ever been really." Tatsuha smirked in satisfaction.

Hope suddenly bloomed in Shuichi's chest. Even though he had kissed Eiri before, felt the heat and passion of that kiss, he could never bring himself to believe that it was because of him and not because of the effect he had on Eiri with his powers.

Seeing the light begin to bloom once more in the other young man's eyes, Tatsuha silently patted himself on the back. "You know Eiri's been down right miserable lately. A real dick head."

Shuichi shook his hope out of his head for a moment to listen to Tatsuha.

"I've been afraid to leave him alone, you know. I haven't seen him quite this dark since before the-" He cut himself off. "Before you saved him."

Sighing again, Shuichi cradled his chin on the heel of his hand. "I know. He's so alone but refuses to admit it. The cold is eating away at him and he's helpless or refusing to stop."

Sitting quietly and listening to him, Tatsuha didn't ask how Shuichi could have known this. Some things, he decided, were better left a mystery and simply accepted at face value.

"If you can, I beg you to help him."

Smiling reassuringly, Shuichi reached over and laid a hand on top of Tatsuha's. "No need, Tatsuha. I think that I need Eiri just as much as he needs me now. I want to, and even if I didn't, I couldn't let him continue on like this. After all," he abruptly stood up and beamed a smile at him, "I have a job to do."

Before Tatsuha could say anything more Shuichi had grabbed him in a tight fast hug then disappeared out the door followed by the sound of the coffee house bells.

Smirking to him self Tatsuha grabbed the rest of Shuichi's half eaten lemon bar and popped it in his mouth. "Sorry to disturb your _solitude_, big brother, but it simply had to be done." And he felt no remorse, what so ever.

* * *

A/N: Ok, long wait, but hey! I'm still alive and kicking, er… typing. I love Tatsuha; he's one of my absolutely favorite characters in Gravitation. Please Read and Review! And keep watching for them chapters!

6


	10. The Fire Keeps Burning

Angelic Conception

Gravitation

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

Chapter 10: The World Keeps Turning, The Fire Keeps Burning

* * *

Eiri stood in his kitchen and stared blankly at the can of beer in his right hand then at the bottle of pills in his left.

He weighed his options.

It had been a week, perhaps longer, since he kicked out that empathic freak and his life had seemed increasingly glum and dark. It was like he was stuck in a hole, there was no light, no ladder, no rope, no noise, no nothing to help him escape the all encompassing darkness.

Sighing heavily Eiri put down the bottle of pills and turned around to lean against the counter threading his fingers through his oily hair. Since when had he become so melodramatic? His solitude had never bothered him before. The quiet of his empty apartment had never echoed so loudly in his ears before.

_That was before_, kept ringing in his head. Yes, before, but before what? Before he tried to kill himself? Before he met that infuriating pink headed freak? Before he had a dream that had been so locked down in his subconscious he had almost forgotten about it? He didn't know. All he knew now was that his heart had just about stopped beating.

He turned again and tried to pick up the bottle of pills. Tatsuha wouldn't be coming to visit him today, he was at work. Mika and Tohma were out of town. He could do it. End it all and not have to worry about anything every again.

Ironic. How fucking ironic.

Now that he could and would actually succeed something was keeping him from it.

A flash of frantic violet eyes, a shock of bright pink hair, a whiff of strawberry scent.

Growling, Eiri clutched his beer so tightly the can creaked with strain. Why is that nosy asshole still affecting him like this?

Remembering hurt, Eiri had to admit. The memory of the betrayal he felt when Shuichi had told him he could feel his emotions. Eiri felt all at once hurt, panicked, scared. He was hurt that Shuichi hadn't told him, was probably planning on never telling him. He was panicked that Shuichi knew too much. Never letting anybody in, never telling anybody anything was a defense that Eiri had for a reason and knowing that defense had been so easily breeched was frightening.

It was more than his privacy, it was his heart. Or what was left of it. If Shuichi could feel what he felt it would be all too easy to manipulate him. All too easy. It would be like… like Yuki all over again.

It didn't matter that Shuichi had only helped him since that day in the ER, or that Shuichi had only ever given and never taken. Eiri still felt raw and vulnerable, feelings that made him shut down, shut out, and hole up till the mortar stopped flying. It was one thing when Shuichi soothed him with those gentle glowing hands; it was a completely different thing when Shuichi pried into his feelings, his thoughts without a single effort.

And that is what made Eiri weary.

Glowing hands, sharing dreams, empathic abilities; what other little talents did Shuichi possess? There were things locked away in Eiri's chest, in his mind that didn't need to be exhumed; things that would hurt not only him, but Shuichi if they were tapped into.

And that, Eiri couldn't risk. Without knowing how deep Shuichi's empathic abilities reached Eiri had to distance them. He couldn't have another person he cared about wounded by his past; his siblings were enough.

_Cared about. _

Sighing, Eiri dropped his empty bottle of beer and buried his face in his hands. Since when did he care about the little pink brat? That didn't really matter. It only mattered that Shuichi never find out and never see him again.

Yes, it would be painful for both of them, Eiri knew, but it would be safest; maybe not for himself, but for Shuichi.

A pounding on the door broke the squealing silence in the apartment and distracted Eiri from his troubling thoughts.

Growling in frustration, Eiri leaned away from the counter and headed toward the door. If Tatsuha had skipped his lunch break to check on him again he was going to punch him right in the face.

"Shut up already!" He shouted as he began to unlock the bolts around the door. He had an interior locking deadbolt installed after the last time his well meaning sister and her husband barged in at eight in the morning.

He yanked the door open without checking the peephole and stood completely still for a split second before slamming the door shut again and throwing up every single lock he had available.

Shuichi huffed in frustration from the outside of the door and began pounding again. "Eiri! Eiri open this damn door!"

On his way over he opened his mind to his charge and nearly broke into a hysterical scream on the subway. Despair, self loathing, thoughts of suicide, and the vague intention of following through with them had flooded his body with such force he had broken out in a sweat.

He was barely able to lock up his shields and putty over the cracks before he passed out on the cold aluminum floor. As it was he opened his eyes to being brought to his knees and every one in the train car staring at him as if he was about to start shooting. He had struggled to laugh it off as bad Thai food and scramble back into his seat.

Not willing to risk opening his empathic lines again, Shuichi was practically running through the sudden down pour in his haste to make it to Eiri before he decided to make good on those self destructive thoughts. Bypassing the elevator as too slow he had lunged up the stairs and possibly sprained his wrist when he slammed into the fourth floor entry door.

It was a wonder he didn't slip and break his neck on the shiny tile flooring in the hall.

Hissing as his wrist ached in pain Shuichi shook it ferociously and resumed his beating on the door with his other hand. "Open it, you asshole!"

His drenched pink bangs fell into his eyes and he began to kick at the door hurling every cuss word he knew at it. "Fucking shit! Eiri!" Heart pounding and air conditioning beginning to cool his soaked cloths Shuichi shivered with the chill. "Open the God damned door!"

"Tsk, tsk." Shuichi jumped and snapped his head in the direction of that familiar voice. "It's not nice to take the Lord's name in vain."

"Gabriel!" Shuichi lunged forward and clutched at the Angel's soft white tunic. "You have to get me in there!"

Taken aback by the request, Gabriel blinked. "I'm not really supposed to work like that."

"Come on!" Shaking the Angel, Shuichi pleaded. "Eiri's thinking about swallowing a bottle of pills! I need to get in there!"

"Shu-chan." Gabriel frowned at him. "You're supposed to use your ability and your heart to help him without assistance from me. I can't help you other than to give you advice."

"Then why the fuck are you here!?" He shouted at the tall Angel. Slamming his fist into the wall beside Gabriel's head Shuichi growled, "Open that door, Gabriel, or I swear to God I will disembowel you right here in the hall."

Emitting a frightened squeak Gabriel slapped his hand, palm flat, against the door and released some of his power into the wood. The sound of the many locks unlatching eased Shuichi's panic.

Un-fisting his hands from Gabriel's wrapped tunic, Shuichi glanced down at his feet slightly embarrassed. "Um… thank you." He muttered before he opened the door and rushed in without a backward glance.

Waiting for the door to slide close behind his charge, Gabriel breathed a sigh of relief and slumped against the wall.

"You know you are immortal right?"

Lifting his head and glaring at his partner, Gabriel growled, "I know Peter, but it would have been very painful having Shuichi try to disembowel me. I have a very low pain tolerance."

Sighing and shaking his head, Peter turned and began to make his way back to the stairwell. "Come on Gabe. You should start rehearsing how you're going to explain interference like this to Him and the council."

Huffing, Gabriel pushed himself away from the wall and followed his know-it-all partner. "He'll understand."

"I didn't say He wouldn't." Peter turned back around to hide his smirk of amusement. "It's the Seraph council you should be worried about."

Gabriel whimpered and ran after Peter with his head lowered and his tail between his legs.

* * *

Shuichi bolted through the entrance way into the kitchen then down the hall and slamming into the master bedroom.

"What the fuck?!" Eiri was taken by surprise and didn't have anytime to prepare himself before he felt Shuichi's body impact with his sending them both sailing backwards to land on the rumpled bed.

Wrapping his arms as tightly as possible around Eiri's chest he opened up all rivers and streams between them and let loose the strongest flood of warmth and comfort he could without making himself pass out.

A familiar orange glow surrounded them both and Eiri tried to fight the warmth seeping into this bones and hollowed out chest. Gritting his teeth in the pain of thawing, Eiri fisted his hands in Shuichi's shirt and shut his eyes tight struggling against the surprisingly strong embrace around him.

_It's alright, Eiri. Don't fight me. Please don't fight me._

Shuichi's calming voice echoed in his mind and soothed the pounding in his temples.

_Let the warmth in. Calm down and concentrate on my voice. _

Like gentle caressing hands Shuichi's words softened the burning pain.

_Relax your muscles. Match my breathing, my heartbeat. _

Almost automatically Eiri's hands eased their grip and began to press, flat palmed, against Shuichi's shoulders with incredible strength. His frantic heartbeat began to slow to match the sedate one ringing in his chest, and the pumping of his lungs lessened till he was taking deep lazy breaths.

_That's it… Almost there._

Eiri's jaw unclenched and the straining lines of his brows and eyelids melted away till all that was left was a slight fluttering of his eyelashes.

"Hmm…" The orange glow receded and Shuichi's arms went slack in exhaustion. His ear was pressed to Eiri's now calm heartbeat and the rise and fall of his chest was soothing to both his frayed nerves and his pounding headache. Perhaps he shouldn't have attempted all that in one session.

The pain had miraculously stopped. Eiri's chest didn't feel quite so hollow and he could feel the beating of his own heart again. The weight of Shuichi's completely limp body was comforting and he couldn't bring himself to open his eyes. His only clue that Shuichi was still alive and breathing on top of him was the beating of his heart against his stomach and the slight rising and falling of his back under his hands.

Letting his hands glide downward Eiri brought them to rest on Shuichi's lower back. He didn't feel like moving much more than that. He knew he should be angry at the intrusion not only into his mind but into his apartment as well. He should be throwing the little punk out on his ear, but he couldn't move, could barley think as a mater of fact.

Resisting the urge to grimace as Eiri's hands slid down his back, Shuichi took stock of his situation. His skin felt tight and raw, he could just barely taste blood in his mouth, and his head felt like an elephant had crushed it. Next time, he decided, he wasn't going to emit that much energy in one flood like that again.

"Shuichi." Eiri had gathered enough curiosity mixed with annoyance to finally break the downy soft silence. "What are you doing here?" He didn't need to ask what he'd just done. That much was obvious.

Swallowing a mixture of blood and saliva to wet his dry throat, Shuichi croaked, "You needed me. Could feel it. Needed my help."

Frowning slightly at the sound of Shuichi's voice, his eyes still closed, Eiri asked, "How could feel me? You weren't anywhere near me."

Coughing faintly to relieve the scratch in his raw throat, Shuichi responded, "Doesn't matter. I can always feel you. Been checking up on you since you kicked me out."

"Shuichi?" Eiri opened his eyes and looked down at the head lying on his chest and brushed the pink bangs away from Shuichi's pale face. "Are you alright?"

He wanted to say yes. He wanted to tell him everything would be fine and he just needed to lie still for few more moments, but his chest seized and his body was thrown into a sudden coughing fit. Yep, he is definitely never going to use that much energy up at once again.

"Shit!" Eiri bolted up as blood dripped from Shuichi's mouth. "Shuichi!" His body was raking with every cough, his face was as pale as death and his skin was suddenly slick with sweat.

"Oh fuck!" Lifting Shuichi into his arms Eiri ran to the door snatching his keys on the way. "Hold on, Shuichi. You're going to be okay. I'm taking you to the hospital."

Shuichi's head lolled back. He didn't have the strength to lift it up and tell Eiri that he didn't need to go anywhere; that he was going to be just fine. All that escaped his blood tinted lips was, "Eiri" before his eyes rolled back into his head and he lost consciousness.

* * *

When Gabriel and Peter stepped out of the clouds and into their laboratory it seemed as though all hell had broken loose.

"What's going on?" Gabriel rushed toward Teresa and looked over her shoulder at the screen of her computer.

"Shuichi's output levels just sky rocketed!" Teresa was typing frantically at her keyboard and a series of data lines sprang to the forefront.

"Holy shit!" Gabriel was never one to curse, but what he read had his fingers in his hair and his wings ridged in panic. "How did this happen?"

"One major blast of healing to Eiri-san, Sir." Jonas supplied from his station. "The black void was nearly closed all in one blow! I've never seen anything like it."

"Timothy!" Peter called the other angel. "What are your readouts on Shuichi's physical status?"

"He's on the verge of cardiac arrest!" Timothy frantically sifted through sheet after sheet as they came spitting out of the seismograph like machine. "His lungs have begun to deteriorate and his brain tissue is severely bruised!"

"His regenerative rate! What is his regenerative rate?!" Gabriel shouted in panicked anger mixed with fear.

"Too slow, Sir." Teresa scanned a printout and began to furiously calculate numbers and percentiles in her head. "His energy was almost completely spent. His regeneration abilities are working over time just to keep his lungs from withering in his chest and his brain for developing permanent damage. They're not even touching his heart."

"At this rate he'll go into cardiac arrest before he's even able to reach to hospital!" Jonas was shoving slide after slide under a microscope. "Eiri-san is stuck in a traffic jam!"

"Shit!" Gabriel's wings were quivering in panic. "Shit, shit, shit!"

"Gabriel!" Peter clutched at the other angel with painfully tight hands on his upper arms. "Calm down. Shuichi needs you."

Nodding Gabriel took a deep breath, then two before opening his eyes again and clasping Peter's arms in return. "Thank you, Peter."

"Just hurry." Peter gave him a reassuring scowl before pushing him toward the laboratory doors and watching his friend dive into the clouds.

* * *

Eiri honked frantically at the unmoving traffic. "Fuck, shit, fuck!" Glancing in his rearview mirror he laid on the horn again. Shuichi had blood trailing from his mouth to pool on his Mercedes' carpeted back seat floor.

His hands were shaking and his heart was pounding so fast he felt like a rabbit. Shuichi couldn't die! But he was stuck in the middle of downtown with a sudden traffic jam and the four lanes of cars at a stand still. "Come on. Come on!" He slammed the heel of his hand against the steering wheel and cursed again.

"Stay calm Eiri."

Jumping in surprise, Eiri swung around to find a dark haired man dressed in some kind of toga in his backseat with Shuichi's head in his lap. "Who the fuck are you?"

Gently stroking Shuichi's sweat soaked bangs away from his face, Gabriel slowly began to filter his energy into the dying young man. His hand was beginning to burn hot with the effort to keep Shuichi's heart pumping. "My name is Gabriel. I'm here to help you."

Eye's widening, Eiri watched as the hand Gabriel had laid over Shuichi's heart glowed bright red like the embers in a dying fire. "You're healing him."

"No." Gabriel shook his head and continued to stroke Shuichi's hair. "I'm not strong enough for that. I'm keeping him alive until you can reach the hospital."

Choosing not to ask anymore questions of this miracle, Eiri's grip tightened on the wheel. "But the traffic is dead still. I can't move!"

Closing his eyes and concentrating, Gabriel split his mind's voice and prayed twice as hard. Opening them again, he instructed, "Take the next exit. I'll give you directions from there."

Frowning Eiri turned around and jolted when he saw that the cars were beginning to lurch forward slowly but surely. Signaling and zipping between vehicles Eiri took the exit and slammed his foot on the gas, taking every turn and lane change Gabriel instructed.

Pulling into the hospital driveway and speeding toward the emergency drop off, Eiri looked in his rearview mirror at the sound of Gabriel's voice.

"Shuichi will be fine, Eiri." Gabriel lifted his blistered hand from Shuichi's chest and his scorched fingers from Shuichi's forehead. "He's alive. Stay with him and you'll both live through this."

It felt as though Gabriel was speaking of something bigger than the here and now. Eiri blinked and opened his mouth to say something more, to thank the mysterious man in his backseat only to find that Gabriel was gone as suddenly as he had come in the first place.

Shutting his mouth, Eiri concentrated on pulling up to the opened emergency room doors and the waiting gurney, nurses, and doctor.

Rushing out of his car to open the backdoor and gently pulling Shuichi from his backseat, Eiri watched as he was wheeled away and into the hospital leaving only drying blood on his leather seats and a plump nurse asking for his information.

And for the first time since leaving his home at the temple, Eiri prayed.

* * *

A/N: Long wait but it was worth it! Lots of good drama going on! I can't wait for the next chapter, myself.


	11. The Littlest Birds

Friday, June 26, 2009

Gravitation

Angelic Conception

Warnings: slight angst, future m-preg, mention of NCS, mention of suicide attempts/thoughts, supernatural

Chapter 11: The Littlest Birds Sing the Prettiest Songs

* * *

Shuichi couldn't feel much apart from the ache in his head and the tightness of his skin over his bones. Everything seemed to be floating in a gelatinous pool. His hearing was muffled, his breathing slow and deliberate.

Grains of memory slowly filtered through the dark grey of unconsciousness.

Being lifted into Eiri's arms, a shaky ride through bleach white halls with masked faces hanging over him, bright lights harried voices. If he could groan he would.

Eiri had rushed him to the hospital. He didn't know exactly what happened after that, but he knew he was now alive and lying in a sterilized room on an uncomfortable bed hooked up to God knows how many machines.

Perhaps it was time to open his eyes and find exactly what had happened to him.

The light was bright and his eyes hurt as his pupils dilated. He realized he couldn't really swallow to ease the dry ache in his throat because he had a giant breathing tube shoved into his mouth and more oxygen tubes stuck in his nose. There was a dull ache between his legs alerting him to the horrifying fact that he had a catheter inserted up his… God he wished he could groan at the very least.

Twitching his various digits and limbs, just to make sure they still worked, Shuichi discovered that apart from the IV in his right hand his fingers were being held rather tightly in a warm slightly shaking hold.

Rolling his eyes to the side, Shuichi was surprised to find Eiri with his head bent and both hands wrapped around his smaller fingers. Flexing his fingers Shuichi wished he had the strength to do more than squeeze as Eiri's head snapped up, his beautiful golden eyes filled with tears.

When they had finally let him into the room they had put Shuichi in, Eiri was fighting a panic attack. He hadn't had a panic attack since that night with Yuki.

The image of that small vivacious body strapped up to a breathing machine, tubes and needles puncturing every inch of exposed skin it seemed, Eiri had wanted to fall to his knees and wail out his fear and pain. But he didn't do that.

He thanked the nurse for escorting him, pulled out his phone dialed his brother, giving him the task of tracking down Shuichi's family before he slowly, as if in a dream, walked up to the bed and collapsed into the chair beside the hospital bed.

Tentatively as if afraid he would cause more damage than he already had, Eiri brushed his fingers over Shuichi's, careful not to touch the IV sticking out of the back of his hand. He found them to be cold and unmoving.

That was when he felt something; something that his therapist, Mizuki, had been striving to achieve for who knows how many years. He felt the itching in the back of his throat, the burning in his eyes, the sudden ache in his chest, then finally the tears pouring down his cheeks.

It was because of him; because of his stubbornness, his fear, his depression, his self loathing that Shuichi was lying in that bed after narrowly escaping death. He couldn't hold it back any longer.

Grasping Shuichi's still, cold fingers in his shaking hands, Eiri let the tears course through his body and down his cheeks to land on the hospital floor. He let the fear and pain surface for the first time in a very long time, and he hated himself even more.

He didn't know how long he had been like that, head bowed, hands holding Shuichi's fingers, tears scorching his flesh, when he felt the weak squeeze inside his hand.

Pulling his hands away and wiping at his burning eyes, Eiri watched as Shuichi's gaze filled with pain for him. Standing he pressed the nurse assistance button and stood back silently as nurses and doctors rushed into the room.

Shuichi never took his eyes off of Eiri throughout the whole painful, tedious, and disconcerting process as his doctor and boss, Doctor K, exclaimed over how he should be dead and how he shouldn't even be awake yet while the nurses unhooked the breathing machine and gently pulled the tube out of his throat and out of his mouth.

Finally able to breathe normally again, Shuichi relaxed into the bed and began to listen to Doctor K, his eye still locked on Eiri.

"You were brought in a step away from cardiac arrest, Shuichi. You lungs are scarred and your brain is bruised, though those things aren't life threatening anymore. I'm going to keep you for observation until I'm satisfied." Doctor K jotted some things down on Shuichi's chart.

Nodding, Shuichi tried to open his mouth and respond only to hear a rattling croak.

Eiri stepped forward and held an ugly mauve colored plastic cup with a straw in front of Shuichi's lips watching as he took small careful sips. He pulled the cup back when Shuichi released the straw and placed it back on the table beside the bed.

Moving his tongue around in his mouth with more ease, Shuichi opened his mouth again. "Thank you. Doctor K, would it be at all possible to get the catheter removed? I'm pretty sure I can piss on my own now."

Throwing his long haired blond head back and laughing outrageously K responded, "No!" before turning around and leaving the room, Shuichi's chart swinging from its place on the hook at the foot of his bed.

Sighing, Shuichi leaned his head back and closed his suddenly burning eyes. "Well, I guess that answered that question."

"How can you do that?" Eiri's hands were shaking just about as much as his voice.

Shuichi opened his eyes and turned to look at him. "What?"

"You almost had a heart attack, Shuichi. I watched you bleed on my backseat while I was stuck in traffic for fuck's sake!" Eiri thrust his fingers in his hair and pulled.

Heart aching in his chest for the pain and fear radiating off of Eiri, Shuichi lifted a hand and placed it on the closest part of Eiri's body he could reach. "I'm so sorry Eiri. If I'd have known that was going to happen I wouldn't have-"

"What?" Eiri snapped, fighting the comforting feel of Shuichi's hand on his hip and the lingering fear in his chest. "You wouldn't have what? Healed me? Blasted me with all that fucking warmth? What?!"

Grasping at Eiri's shirt and pulling him toward the bed Shuichi replied, "I wouldn't have used that much energy so fast. I wouldn't have attempted healing you so thoroughly after nearly passing out on the subway. I wouldn't have used my gift without thought to its affect on me. I'm so sorry."

Feeling the tears begin to rise to the surface again, Eiri let himself be pulled down to sit on the edge of the bed. "You were coughing up blood, Shuichi."

"I know." Shuichi tugged and urged until he had Eiri lying down next to him, curled almost around him, his head pillowed on his chest so that Eiri could hear his still beating heart. "I'm so sorry Eiri."

Closing his eyes and wrapping his arm around Shuichi's stomach loosely, Eiri listened to the strong tempo being measured out by Shuichi's heart.

Stroking his fingers through Eiri's golden blond hair, and rubbing a hand comfortingly over his arm, Shuichi let the calmness and the comfort of the situation heal some of his still frazzled nerves and sooth his raw skin. They laid in silence, Eiri unconsciously matching his breathing to the rise and fall of Shuichi's chest, and Shuichi concentrating on the delicate restructuring of his shields.

Tightening his fingers to contour to Shuichi's ribs, Eiri spoke into the silence. "A man, Gabriel, appeared in my backseat while I was stuck in traffic on the way to the hospital."

Shuichi's gentle stroking through his hair and up and down his arm stopped. Eiri lifted his head and looked into Shuichi's surprised violet eyes. "He said he was keeping you alive. I-I even think he somehow got the traffic to move. Who is he, Shuichi?"

He didn't know if he was allowed to tell, but looking into Eiri's shadowed golden eyes and Shuichi knew he was going to anyway. "Gabriel is my Guardian Angel."

Frowning slightly Eiri shook his head then laid it back down on Shuichi's chest. "At least that explains the toga."

Shuichi was surprised into a sudden laugh that left him coughing in pain.

Bolting up from his curled position around Shuichi, Eiri asked frantically, "Are you alright? I'm going to get a nurse."

"No!" Shuichi clutched at his hand halting his flight off the bed and out the door. "It's okay. I'm just moving a little too fast. I wasn't expecting to heal this slowly."

Eying him in suspicion, Eiri returned to his place against Shuichi's side. "Are you sure? I'm not hurting you, am I?"

"No. You're not." Shuichi smiled reassuringly at him and resumed his gentle ministrations with his hands. "In fact you're helping heal me."

Doubting it but willing to play along, Eiri asked, "How is that? Aren't I the reason you overtaxed yourself in the first place?"

"You didn't do this to me, Eiri." Shuichi placed his fingers under Eiri's chin and pulled till the blond man was looking him in the eye. "Don't think that just because I don't have enough energy to heal even myself that I can't still tell exactly what you're feeling. You did not cause this, Eiri. Do not lay blame on yourself for something you couldn't prevent when you are still hurting so deeply inside."

Closing his eyes in the wash of pain that last statement caused, Eiri tipped his head down till his mouth and nose were buried against Shuichi's palm. Inhaling his natural and soothing scent, Eiri left that subject behind for now. "How am I helping you?"

Recognizing the change in subject for what it was, Shuichi decided to let him hide for now. "You're nearness is soothing. When we're apart it feels like I'm stretched too thin, like I'm a rag doll and my seams are being pulled away."

He withdrew his hand from Eiri's face and pressed his head back down over his heart. "Because of my gift I have natural regeneration abilities, but my body becomes strained with the effort to stay connected to you over a distance. I wouldn't have had such a violent reaction to the release of that much energy if I hadn't already been strained and exhausted. After I closed the flood gate, so to speak, my regeneration couldn't keep up with my body's deterioration."

Turning his face to press against the beating heart beneath him, Eiri asked, "Gabriel said that if I stayed with you we would both live."

"Yes." Shuichi closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around Eiri's shoulders. "My job is to help heal your soul and help you live. My energy comes from me. The longer and farther apart we are the harder my gift tries to maintain some connection with you. The effort… eats away at me."

_Literally_.

Shuichi didn't say it, but Eiri heard it just the same. The irony was almost enough to make him laugh, but he felt like crying instead. He was trying to protect this pink haired idiot and in doing so nearly killed him; inadvertently or not.

The sky outside the hospital window was graying and neither Shuichi nor Eiri wanted to continue in their conversation. Shuichi's body called for sleep and Eiri's frazzled nerves called for the time to shore up his own shields.

They were both soothed by the other's presence as they drifted into much needed sleep.

* * *

Peter paced up and down as he waited for Gabriel to return from earth. He would stop every now and then looking up and down, back and forth for any sign of his partner and friend.

The perplexing thing about traveling between Heaven and Earth was that when you were coming back there was no telling where you would appear. You could pop out of the clouds like a daisy, materialize out of thin air like a bad zit, or plummet to the floor like a meteor.

Peter huffed in inpatients as he tried to peer through the star speckled void at the edge of the clouds. Ever since the laboratory equipment stopped whirling and squealing like chickens with their heads chopped off, he had been at the edge of Heaven awaiting Gabriel's return.

Turning in his pace the sound of wind rushing through feathers caught Peter's attention. Spinning around, he cursed under his breath.

Gabriel was indeed plummeting to the clouded floor. His body was limp, his wings pushed out in front of him by the wind as he fell head first like Icarus, feathers floating down after him.

Shouting in surprise, Peter sprinted forward and made it in time to catch is falling friend before he impacted with the cloud covered ground. Brought to his knees by the force of Gabriel's plunge, Peter looked down at his friend in concern. "Gabriel?"

Groaning and slowly lifting his head, Gabriel pried his eye open and gave him a weak smile. "Hey Peter."

Huffing out a breath in relief Peter scowled at his partner in his arms. "Are you hurt?"

His head lolling to the side Gabriel closed his eyes in exhaustion and buried his face in Peter's shoulder. "Not really." He grimaced then as he tried to flex his hands. "My hands just hurt like Hell."

Supporting his friend with one arm, Peter grabbed at his hands with the other inhaling a sharp breath when they opened to reveal his burns. "Oh, Gabe." Gabriel's right palm was blistered bright red and peeling layers of skin off, all five of his left fingers weren't much better.

Sighing, Peter asked, "Do you think you can walk?"

Grimacing when he tired to flex his feet, Gabriel cradled his hands against his chest and shook his head in Peter's shoulder. "I can't move them, too painful."

"Alright." Peter scooped Gabriel's legs up and lifted his injured friend into the air, Gabriel's wings closing around the arm supporting his shoulders. "Let's get you back to the laboratory and get something on those hands."

"Okay." Gabriel gritted his teeth against the pain radiating through his body. "I think I over did it."

"I would say so." Peter agreed, keeping his steps slow and steady so as not to jar Gabriel more than necessary. "What happened down there, Gabe?"

Sighing, Gabriel closed his warm brown eyes again and eased the ache in his neck by resting his head on Peter's shoulder. "When I got down there Shuichi's heart had already stopped. It took more energy than I thought to jump start it again. Eiri was in such a panic I had to emit calm into the car so he wouldn't start to hyperventilate."

Glancing down at his pale and exhausted friend, Peter exclaimed, "It's a wonder you got back at all."

"That's not all," Gabriel chuckled weakly. "There was a fender bender. I had to speed up the road side workers to get the wreck moved to the side so the traffic would start to move."

"Lord! Gabriel!" Peter glared down at him. "It's a bloody miracle that you got back! You should be stuck on earth trying to recuperate enough to make the journey back."

Laughing at the irony in his rescuer's choice of expletives, Gabriel replied, "It was either move the wreck or drain my power completely waiting for the traffic to thin. I don't think I would have made it back at all if I had done that."

He was right, Peter knew it, but that didn't stop him from wanting to beat his friend to within an inch of his immortal life. "You could have called me for help."

"No." Gabriel was beginning to loose the thread of the conversation. His hands had gone numb and he couldn't really feel the rest of his body. "Would have taken too long."

"You're right." Peter conceded then glanced down at his half asleep partner. "Go ahead and get some rest, Gabe. We're almost there."

"M'kay." His head was fuzzy and his eyes burned tiredly behind his lids, but he had enough energy to not be able to stop his thoughts from being voiced before he lost consciousness. "I like it when you call me Gabe. You should do it more often."

Surprised by this, Peter's eyes widened and he looked down to reply only to find that Gabriel had fallen asleep. Sighing again, Peter resumed his trek toward the nearing lab murmuring to his oblivious partner, "I'll keep that in mind, Gabe."

* * *

A/N: At first I wasn't going to include all the angels as much as all this, but they are just so great! I can't not include them! It's like they flow from my fingers. They're so freaking adorable too! Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter. The next one should be coming out pretty soon, so keep a watch out for it. Love ya'll faithful readers for sticking with me through my extremely long waiting periods.


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